Review by Psycho Penguin

Reviewed: 06/30/03 | Updated: 06/30/03

I hope I never have a daughter.. cuz then she might play this game!

I love the board game Othello. It's actually a game that takes some brains, and can prove to be a lot of fun if you play it with someone that you with to humiliate. Or someone that you care about, but humiliating someone is so much more fun. I used to stay up nights wondering, what if this game came out for nintendo?

Thank god they made a video game off this game!

Too bad it sucks. The graphics are all screwy, and the controls are abysmal. The computer likes to cheat a lot. There is no good that could possibly come out of playing this game. It's like throwing a sock into a microwave and then expecting macaroni and cheese to appear in 60 seconds. You can't put Othello into video game format, put weird graphics and annoying sounds in it, and expect it to be such a good game. I really have no clue what the developers of the game were smoking when they made this game, but I want some of that stuff, so I can give it to Sapharos and he can sell it for lots of money with his nice shiny watch.

The storyline is really non exsistant, but I'll return you to the reguarly scheduled bashing review crap since you already knew this.

And yes, the game looks HORRIBLE. You know how Othello is, like, black and white pieces and a plain background in board game format? Clearly this is too unoriginal for the fine folks at.. whoever made this.. so they decided to do us all a huge favor and make the pieces PINK and BLUE. The board itself looks like I took a puke after reading a bananagirl post, as it's bright orange and very sickly looking. The whole game just looks disturbing. I don't get why they felt the need to sacrifice quality plain graphics for annoying colorful neon graphics. It just makes the game look poor.

Sadly the game doesn't throw crappy music at you in an attempt to sound poor, though. Fortunately, you still get to hear a poorly done sound effect that sounds like a car engine attempting to drag a dead dog down the freestate at 3 AM every time you attempt to make a move. I am personally offended by this game. I love dogs. So, don't think the game is good because it has no music - it just delays your inevitable torture a little bit!

Yes, don't listen to Kasket's lying ass, there is no music in this game after the title screen. And there's not 8 robot masters in Mega Man, either, you fool.

Believe it or not, the controls were actually pretty decent! Sure, you couldn't actually survey the entire board, but at least you could actually make the moves you were allowed to make. The game isn't all that buggy! Well, it is, but the controls are at least passable. REVELATION!

There's only one reason to actually play Othello, and that's for the computer vs. you mode. That was the game's only selling point, and it actually managed to fail in this regard, too. Stupid video game developers that just make these messed up video games just to make a quick dollar. I certainly hope no one actually bought this game back in the day, because if I see a NES Parchesi that plays and looks like this, I'm going to personally kill each and every one of you that bought this crap 15 years ago.

Anyways, I rambled. Sorry, I'm known to do that sometimes! *ahem* Finally you get to challenge the computer and see how you can handle Othello. It's perfect for when you are all by yourself and you suddenly get the need for some good Othello action, but no one is allowed to play with you. So far, so good, you got your nice copy of Othello all ready. You turn it on, and.... you get to choose one of three difficulties. Too bad they won't actually do anything, because each mode is equally as challenging. But it's not challenging because it's the fun kind of challenging, oh no. You see, the computer will cheat A LOT. It might just be physically impossible to actually win a game of Othello without getting lucky. I don't know how to accomplish this. You get a 2 player mode, but buy the board game, please.

Bah, that almost sounded like a real review. Back to the insults!

This game has about as much replay value as listening to a 311 album. There is seriously no reason to want to play this game. The computer's cheating ass will soon annoy you, and you will get annoyed with the awful graphics and the sound effect from hell. The game tried to be creative looking and failed. If you ever feel the need to play Othello, would you prefer to play against a friend or foe or against a cheating computer that seems to know exactly what you wish to accomplish and prevents you from doing so? I choose the former, thank you very much. (You're welcome is not a suitable or funny answer, as it is a RHETORICAL Thank you very much)

The game is also much too challenging, due to the fact the computer seems to think six spaces ahead of you, and making any sort of strategy is none. The best part of Othello is that you have to outthink your opponent. This game relies far more on luck and sheer will than actual skill or brain power, and that's where it became most disappointing. I shouldn't have to lose by 10 to the computer because he always outthinks me no matter what I do. I think of every plan in the book, and nothing seems to work. It seems like I'm not the only one that has had this problem, so I have reason to believe it is actually the computer's fault and not my stupid ass sucking at another video game!

So, the game has all the necessary elements needed to be a terrible video game, and it does so in style. The only reason I won't give the game a 1/10 is that the game actually doesn't change the physics or style of play of Othello - I half expected it to after seeing the ugly ass graphics that look like nothing I've ever seen before. The controls are actually pretty suitable, and you can actually do moves without fear of the game not recognizing it. Of course, it won't matter, since the computer will just dominate you anyways. Just avoid Othello, please. No good will come out of you playing it. It's simply the worst video game recreation of a board game I've ever played, and I played The Game of Life on PSX!

When asked if he believed in hell, little Timmy said, ''I have been to hell, I've played Othello.''

2/10, and with style.

Rating:   1.0 - Terrible

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