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User Info: Guybrush_Three

4 years ago#311
Gunnery Chief: This, recruits, is a 20-kilo ferris slug, feel the weight. Every five seconds, the main gun of an everest class dreadnought accelerates one to 1.3% of light-speed. It impacts with the force of a 38-kiloton bomb. That is three times the yield of the city-buster dropped on Hiroshima back on Earth. That means- Sir Issac Newton is the deadliest son-of-a-b**** in space. Now! Serviceman Burnside! What is Newton's first law?

Serviceman: Sir! An object in motion stays in motion, sir!

Gunnery Chief: No credit for partial answers, maggot!

Serviceman: Sir! Unless acted on by an outside force, sir!

Gunnery Chief: Damn straight! I dare to assume you ignorant jackasses know that space is empty. Once you fire this hunk of metal, it keeps going till it hits something. That can be a ship. Or the planet behind that ship. It might go off into deep space and hit somebody else in ten thousand years. If you pull the trigger on this, you are ruining someones day, somewhere and sometime. That is why you check your targets. That is why you wait for the computer to give you a damn firing solution. That is why, Serviceman Chung, we do not "eyeball it". This is a weapon of mass destruction. You are not a cowboy shooting from the hip!

User Info: Marikhen

4 years ago#312
KillerTruffle posted...
Could be WarCraft 2 also, if I remember right (and that was a long time ago, so I might not).

It was Warcraft 2, along with:
"Join the Army they said."
"See the world they said."
"I'd rather be sailing."


Borderlands 2
"Butt Stallion says hello."
"Bacon is for sycophants and products of incest."

"I named him Waggleton P. Tallylicker, but I never got the chance to tell him. He will be remembered."

Hellgate: London
- Arlo
"Holy s*** what the f*** do we have here?"
"Ever had a duck slapped across your face so hard you blacked the f*** out?
"When you reload the gun you bought from me it might explode. That's a f***ing feature!"
"Fine broad like you makes the wagon of bulls*** I call work much nicer."
"Come again soon if you're not killed by the faulty s*** I sold you."
"Nah, you don't want to purchase my s*** guns. They fire sideways... They're built by zombie r*****s in some f***ing outreach program."
"I need money for booze and prostitutes."
"Should have purchased the extended warranty!"

There's going to be a lot of overlap between those three links, but I don't know if any of them are complete and some have lines from him I've never heard. He is seriously one of the most bats*** insanely funny NPCs I've ever come across.

Then there's Holloway's original voice acting...

Sacred 2's got some interesting ones too, like the quote in my signature. Then there's Overlord. Don't have the save any more, don't remember the quote exactly, and I can't find anything about it with a couple quick searches, but after defeating a halfling boss one of the villagers says something like, "I always said never trust anything that's knee high to your <crotch>."

Festus Krex - "Well, you know the old saying. When life gives you lemons... Go murder a clown."

Probably dozens if not hundreds more laugh-worthy quotes I could think of, but I don't remember them. :-(
Stop complaining. I could have done this more painfully. - Dryad from Sacred 2.

User Info: EpicKingdom_

4 years ago#313
War is when the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. -Niko Bellic.
3570k (212 Evo) | Z77 Extreme 4 | Sapphire 7850 2GB OC | 8GB DDR3 1600Mhz | XFX PRO650w CE | 1TB Black WD | Fractal Design Define R4 | 3840x1080 | Logitech Z623

User Info: Yombiee

4 years ago#314
"So I kicked him in the head til he was dead!"


"Durr, I push da buttonz.."

"But I'm just a gnooooome......"

"Who wants some wang?"

"Catch me later, i'll buy you a beer."

User Info: Marikhen

4 years ago#315
Yombiee posted...
"Who wants some wang?"

Shadow Warrior?
Stop complaining. I could have done this more painfully. - Dryad from Sacred 2.

User Info: Alex1976

4 years ago#316
Sam & Max Hit the Road

Max: How come I don't get any inventory?
Sam: Where would you keep it?
Max: That's none of your damn business, Sam.

Max: It says "egavas elgnuj nni".
Sam: Close enough for jazz.

GTA: Vice City

Ricardo Diaz: Eject! Plastic CRAP! You doing this to me?! Who do you think you are, you piece of plastic s***?! Aargh! (Grabs pistol and shoots the VCR twice) SCREW YOU! (Sees Tommy Vercetti) It eats my favorite El Burro movie, it die! What else could I do?
Tommy: It's probably not plugged in.
Diaz: What? (Sees the VCR wasn't plugged in) Damn. No matter...I can buy a hundred more.
When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

User Info: Catluver17

4 years ago#317
MetalKingBoo posted...
I'll go with some lame yet slightly funny ones...

"Where's the DAMN fourth chaos emerald?!"
"Find the computer room!"

Both from the same game.

You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
Repeat x1000
Sigs are for people with something to say.
So i say this: ......

User Info: gikos

4 years ago#318
got more from PW

Phoenix: It's not something I can claim to understand... But you and Mr. White are lovers, aren't you!
Grossberg: W-w-what! My boy!
Phoenix: You sent that painting to him! As a sign! A sign of undying love!
Grossberg: M-m-my boy, please! You're letting your fancies run away with you! Where do you get these bizarre ideas?
Phoenix: I... I don't understand how you could...
Grossberg: That's because I'm not, we're not... Don't be ridiculous!
Grossberg: ...Enough. I'll swallow my pride and tell you all.
Phoenix: (I knew it! They are lovers!)
Grossberg: N-no! We are NOT lovers!

Phoenix: Edgeworth... We don't have so much free time we can spend it coming down here to laugh at you.
Edgeworth: ...Yes you do.
Phoenix: (Actually, he's right.)

Manella: 'Which of course led to me missing my lunch. ROFS'
Phoenix: '(ROFS? Rolling on the Floor.... Starving?)

and of course anytime Wendy oldbag appers before Edgeworth is funny as hell XD
"You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty." - Sacha Guitry (1885-1957)

User Info: Alex1976

4 years ago#319
Gex 2: Enter the Gecko

Gex: Would Cheech and/or Chong report to the front desk?

Gex: Note to self - don't drink tap water at Jerry Garcia's.

Serious Sam

Sam: (After killing his first Headless Kamikaze) AAAAAAAAA yourself! (more Headless Kamikazes approach him) Uh-oh!
When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.
(message deleted)
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