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    FAQ/Walkthrough by GavLuvsGA

    Version: 5 | Updated: 07/02/02 | Search Guide | Bookmark Guide

    FAQ for the N64 by GavLuvsGA@aol.com
    Write to this address with any questions about the game; however, please:
    1) Put "Conker's Bad Fur Day" in the subject heading; if you leave it blank I
    will probably delete your mail.
    2) Do not try to send IMs - or write to me demanding I start accepting them
    when you cannot get through.
    3) Only write about problems or to send tips; please do not ask me weird
    questions like "who is your favourite character?"
    4) Look through the FAQ to see if the answer to your question is in there
    5) No not send attachments with your mail
    And finally, do not take the fact that you know of my existence as automatic
    permission to send me chain letters or stick me on mailing lists; if you think
    I'd like to be on a mailing list, ask me first.
    And please ask my permission before using this on your site.
    Version 5: 02 - 07 - 2002
    Revision history
    Version 2 (21 - 09 - 2001)
    Added more multiplayer tips and cheats.
    Version 3 (19 - 01 - 2002)
    Added some more movie parodies, and added more to the multiplayer section.
    Version 4 (01 - 03 - 2002)
    Added a tip on the zombies section.
    Version 5 (02 - 07 - 2002)
    Discovered - and added - the ultra secret 10 life tail in Barn Boys, and the
    SPUNKJOCKEY cheat.
    1 Characters
    2 Controls
    3 Special Moves
    4 Regular baddies (see Walkthrough for bosses)
    5 Walkthrough
    6 Multiplayer
    7 Money Locations
    8 1 Up Locations
    The star of the game obviously, Conker is lost after getting drunk on his 21st
    Conker's girlfriend.
    BIRDY (Hungover, Windy)
    A drunken scaecrow who teaches you new moves; so called because he scares off
    birds (the feathered kind).
    He will attack you at first, egged on by his "friends" (a paint pot and a paint
    brush); after you save him, however, you befriend him.
    He appears in several cut scenes throughout the game (when you start a new
    He appears (and sings) in the Sloprano chapter.
    THE EVIL TEDIZ (It's War!)
    They are fighting the Grey Squirrels. They appear in the chapter, "It's War!"
    and were created by the Panther King's professor.
    PROFESSOR (Heist)
    He is the chief scientist of the Panther King, and created the Tediz - as well
    as a secret experiment which you find out about later.
    THE GARGOYLE (Hungover)
    Blocks the bridge on the first stage.
    MRS. BEE (Windy)
    She has her hive stolen - twice.
    KING BEE (Barnboys)
    He has been thrown out of his hive, due to his new passion for a sunflower.
    SUNFOWER (Barnboys)
    King Bee's lover (who really loves Conker).
    JACK and BURT (Barnboys)
    Two living blocks.
    MRS. CATFISH (Bats' Tower)
    The manipulative fish gives you a task to retrieve her money.
    TWO - FACED COG (Bats' Tower)
    One side is nasty, the other posh (and camp). He is only interested in
    imprisoning the female cogs.
    THE WEASEL BOSS (Uga Buga, Heist)
    Obviously meant to be a mafia leader, he actually serves the Panther King.
    BUGA (Uga Buga)
    The leader of the Uga Buga tribe.
    JUGGA (Uga Buga)
    Buga's girlfriend.
    RAPTOR (Uga Buga)
    Originally hostile, you eventually befriend him.
    He appears when you die, and also in Spooky.
    BATULA (Spooky)
    Conker's dead, vampiric, ancestor is hungry for blood.
    He is determined to get Conker to fight against the Evil Tediz.
    PRIVATE RODENT (It's War!)
    For once, this character HELPS you! He has a suit on that makes him
    invulnerable (the only one in the game).
    Run, obviously.
    Jump; press twice for the helicopter move, ripped off Tails from the Sonic the
    Hedgehog games.
    Attack (using a frying pan).
    Skip a cut scene, but only if you've seen it already.
    Hold B to fly and press Z to drop Guano. Diving, by holding up, gains speed and
    holding down causes ou to go higher, but slower. Left and right moves you in
    those directions.
    Jump on Franky and use the control stick to move, A to jump and B to attack.
    Jump onto a ladder or rope the use the control stick to go up or down. Jump to
    release your grip.
    Walk onto a B pad and az lightbulb will appear; press B to go into the context
    zone, where you will perform a task, such as firing your catapult or throwing
    knives. Note: Sometimes a lightbulb will appear when you are not on a B pad, so
    keep a look out.
    Skims over dangerous surfaces; press leftand right to control it, up to
    accelerate, B to brake, A to jump and B to attack.
    When riding a raptor, use the same controls as usual; B causes Fangy to bite,
    and swallow an Uga (Caveman); Z lets Fangy headbutt.
    The former is used to kill zombies; the latter on Tediz, these can be taken
    out/returned with B; strafe with C left and right, move back and forth with C
    up and down, enter aiming mode with R. Z fires when pressed quickly, or creates
    a laser sight if held down longer.
    Swim on the surface of water with th control stick; dive with B. Press B to
    swim underwater; when the eyes on the Conker face in the corner begin to bulge,
    quickly surfaced or you will drown.
    See above.
    Contained in the beehive, press Z to fire with the aiming sights and the
    joystick to move around. The radar shows where baddies are.
    BATS (Barnboys, Bat's Tower)
    Swoop down to attack you.
    BLACK WASPS (Windy)
    Simply avoid these; they can be killed with the Gun Turret, however.
    DUNG BEETLES (Windy)
    These can be killed with your catapult. Two hits will kill them (they attack
    after one hit).
    these cannot be killed; simply wait for them to stop firing and run past.
    IMPS (Bat's Tower)
    Can only be killed if you urinate over them.
    RAPTORS (Uga Buga)
    Apart from the ones you ride, the ones round the castle are dangerous and
    cannot be killed.
    ROCK MONSTERS (Uga Buga)
    Very dangerous - unless you have the Uga Bugas on your side.
    STOMPING BRICKS (Barnboys)
    Copied from Super Mario 64, these move around trying to stomp you.
    THE EVIL TEDIZ (It's War!)
    See above
    UGA BUGAS (Uga Buga, obviously)
    They can only be stunned momentarily, unless you have a raptor with you (he
    eats them).
    VILLAGERS (Spooky)
    These will throw spears at you, but are only dangerous when in groups. They
    also need to be fed to Count Batula.
    They are trying to stop you by shooting at you.
    WORMS (Windy)
    They pop out of the ground and attack viciously.
    Similar to the normal worms.
    ZOMBIES (Spooky)
    Very hard to kill, unless you're standing on a gravestone. You need to give one
    shotgun bullet to their head to kill them.
    5.1 HUNGOVER************************************************************
    Difficulty: 0/5
    Rudeness: 2/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Conker will wake up. Take him round to talk to Birdy, who will teach you to use
    the B blocks. Use the one you're on three times, then go to the one at the
    start point; you will take a headache tablet, which makes Conker slightly less
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Swim across the river and make your way up to the Gargoyle, using the Tail
    Helicopter. You will be blocked by a troll; go bck and jup up at the switch to
    pull it, which opens a door. Inside, conker remembers he can use B to hit, so
    use it on the key hopping around and open the door; now, to pass the Gargoyle,
    simply hit him with your pan and he'll fall off the bridge laughing (if you
    fall off, swim into the tunnel, which returns you to the start).
    When the Gargoyle is defeated, rocks will fall down, blocking the exit. Jump
    onto the rocks and jump over to the B pad, which causes a detonator to appear;
    destroy the rocks and exit.
    5.2 WINDY***************************************************************
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Run down the hill, eating chocolate. Grab the extra life on the sign and go
    right, to talk to the Queen Bee, who has had her nest stolen by the black
    wasps. go the other way and pick up the nest; the wasps will attack you. Keep
    heading back to the bee and you'll automatically give it back to her. She will
    then kill the wasps for you (and give you $100).
    Now go over the bridge, where Birdy appears again. Give him $10 for the manual
    (these will return to you!) You will learn to use the Catapult; use it against
    the red wasps (who threaten to "kick the $h1+" out of you after one hit,
    swooping at you. Hit them again and they die. Climb up the hill where they
    5.3 BARNBOYS************************************************************
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 3/5
    Talk to Jack, the blue block thing near the start; his wife is on Jack's head,
    cowering from a mouse. Go round the side of the level and find Burt, and he
    will open the gate leading to the cheese wedges; hit one and run into it to
    grab it, then get back to the mouse; you must go past the blocks that are
    trying to squash you 9like the Grindels from Super Mario 64) , which can be run
    round. If you are hit, fall or take too long, you will drop the cheese and must
    start again. After three visits, the mouse will explode and Jack's wife will
    jump off his head. You can now jump onto her head and then onto the drainpipes
    to get up to the top of the barn, where there is $100 and also a switch (press
    it). It opens the barn.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 2/5
    Enter the barn and the haystacks will begin to bounce around; you will also be
    attacked by Franky the Pitchfork. To avoid him, stand between him and a
    haystack and do your helicopter move as he is about to attack; he will destroy
    the haystack instead. Repeat until all the haystacks are dead (there are two
    chocolate cubes in corners if you need them). After that, Franky will attempt
    to hang himself. Go to the lever that knocks the King Bee out of his nest, and
    opens the attic door, then leave the barn. Some kind of yellow creature will
    invade it at this point.
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 3/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Talk to the King Bee (the ex - husband of the queen bee) and he will tell you
    about his new love, the Sunflower. Talk to her and then go looking for bees;
    the nearest ones are by the boucing box; there are also some by the entrance,
    above where the cheeses were, by the switch that opened the barn, and by the
    bucket over the barn (to get to these, jump onto the top of the roof and climb
    the ladder). Lead all the bees (they will follow you) back to the Sunflower,
    and she will be pollinated by the King Bee. She gives you something to bounce
    on (for reasons of decency I won't say what) to more money. Press and hold A on
    the first bounced, then on the second to the Helicopter move; this takes ages
    to time right, but eventually you will get the money on the  high ledge.
    BARRY & CO.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Get back to the roof of the barn and drop down to the trapdoor which has
    opened, and enter. Avoid the bats that attack you and go to the B pad at the
    end; you will throw knives (aim with Z) at Franky's rope, so you cut it. He
    will now be your friend.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Attack the creature by jumping on Franky's back and pressing B to slide at it
    when behind it. After one hit it will burst into flames; after two, it will
    start using a weapon on you (much like the Terminator). After three hits the
    floor of the barn will collapse, sending you into the ground.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    The fight is not over yet; the creature will turn into a robot, which fires
    missiles at you and claps its hands on you (this costs two life portions).
    Stand behind one of the three pipes (two chocolate squares can be found here)
    and the robot fires a missile at the pipe, bursting it, so water comes out.
    Stay behind the pipe and the robot will run into the water and temporarily
    short circuit. At this point it will begin to spin, so you can get behind him
    where he has a button on his back. Jump as the button hovers overhead and a
    lightbulb appears; if you are quick to press B, Conker will knock one of the
    robot's arms off; repeat twice and the robot will die (with a cry of "I'll Be
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    After this, Conker will mend Franky (who is broken). Now the water will begin
    rising, and tehre are electric wires overhead. Climb the ladder behind the
    "exit" sign and use the Context Zone. Throw knives at the electric wires to
    sever them (and thus make them harmless). Start with the one behind you, then
    tackle the other two nearest you. Do it fast, as well. Now you will be able to
    enter the water without being shocked, as the next three wires are higher up.
    Swim to the other ladder and climb, then high jump onto the Context Pad; there
    are two wires next to you and another across the room. Now you can exit when
    the water level rises to the exit. Now annoy the monk by standing on his slab
    and he'll hurl you up to a high platform (and cash).
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Keep climbing; avoid the three bees (simply watch them and if they approach the
    ladde, move down a bit and they should miss you). At the top, jump and Tail
    Helicopter; press B as soon as the lightbulb appears and you will transform
    into an Anvil, landing on a Context Zone, opening a grate that leads to a 1 -
    up and some more cash. Now leave the level.
    5.4 WINDY (2)***********************************************************
    Difficulty: 0/5
    Rudeness: 3/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Go right after exiting the level and Conker will don a gas mask; enter the hut
    and talk to the Dung Beetle. Now stand on the slab and press B to turn into an
    anvil and break the floor.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Make your way through the tunnels until you find a bull in a field; simply
    avoid his attacks and make your way up the platforms with dung rolling down
    them (avoid this), then run round the tap int the direction of the arrow
    (clockwise), releasing Prune Juice into a trough. A target appears, so stand in
    front of it and jump when the bull charges, making a cow appear.
    YEE - HA!
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 4/5
    Gore: 4/5
    Another target will appear, so get the bull to charge this. It will end up
    stuck in the board, so run round and jump to a lightbulb appears; press B and
    you'll jump on the bull's back (this will happen automatically if you jump next
    time). Charge the cow with Z and she'll go to the Prune Juice and drink,
    immediately getting a runny tummy. She'll stand on the grate in the middle; get
    back ont he bull (making it charge the target) again and make it charge the
    cow, which explodes; another target will appear so repeat the procedure twice
    with Mabel and Olive (the second cow takes two hits to go to the juice and the
    third takes three). The bull will now cause the grat to collapse, falling to
    its death.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Jump down the well, and get the extra life and find the context zone where you
    learn to swim underwater. Simply swim down until you see the hole that leads
    back to the hut, then swim outside where you are rewarded with a dungball.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 2/5
    Gore: 2/5
    Roll the dungball; if you go stright up the slope in front of you, will will be
    stopped by the giant dung beetle; instead go up the slope to the left of where
    you entered, and roll it up the slope; Conker will add T.N.T. and throw it at
    the Dung Beetle, killing it. Roll it up the slope the beetle was blocking
    (another appears) and into the hole at the end; it will appear out a new door
    at the bottom (previously boarded up). Ignore this for now; get the next
    dungball that appears and roll it past the ladder, leading to a sign saying "no
    poo balls". Drop it off the edge, onto a guard and  jump down, standing on the
    post behind him, so the lightbuld appears. once again, become an anvil,
    knocking it down, pulling the plug from the lake and sucking in the other two
    guards. Swim through the door to:
    5.5 BATS' TOWER*********************************************************
    Difficulty: 0/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Talk to the pompous Catfish (ignore the money for now; it's out of reach). She
    and her friends will tell you to wind up the dogfish and they will open the
    safe for you. Swim down the river (there is an extra life behind a waterfall)
    and dive near the dogfish, into a tunnel.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 2/5
    Gore: 1/5
    In the room at the end of the tunnel, talk to the cog with the split
    personality. Now use the lift nearby to go into the rafters. Barry the Bat's
    friends will spot you and attack you (one on each level); simply press B when
    the light appears to burn them. Make your way up, and jump to the lever at the
    top; also try and get to the money (at the very top of the tower); you will
    need to avoid guards for this.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 1/5
    The lever opens a gate in the water below; swim through, avoiding more guards
    and collect all three cogs individually (knock them out, then pick them up).
    Take them to the other cog and when they're all in place, jump on the large
    wheel and run round it clockwise until the first cog breaks off. This will also
    wind up the Dogfish, making him unable to attack the catfish.
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Swim back to the fish and then lead them to the safe (by the Dogfish). Mrs.
    Catfish will open it and you must go in; the only problem is, the money makes a
    hasty exit.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Stand on the Context Zone and watch the spinning wheel; it has the letters
    spelling "OPEN" (among other things). You must fire conkers at the letters
    O,P,E,N when they appear (this is harder to do than it sounds; yo must be ready
    for when they are about to appear). If an alarm goes off (if you hit a wrong
    letter), be warned - you are about to be attacked by a guard, so press B again
    and get out of the way. When all letters have been hit, the floor opens.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Use the Context Zone and you will gain a hard hat and torch; swim under and go
    down the long shaft, avoiding the metal fish (Clang) by hiding in the alcoves
    (these also have bubbles, which top up your air). At the bottom, go down either
    passage and surface in the next room, using the context zone to turn on your
    torch; go down one of the passages with blue lights on (all these pairs of
    passages have a fish in one of them, so beware). At the end, surface and pull
    the lever. Return down the passage, surface, dive and swim down a passage with
    yellow lights down it, and up another shaft, avoiding another fish.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 4/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Next you enter a boiler room, where several fiery imps will attack you. Run
    onto the Context Zone by the barrel of lager and Conker will get drunk. Stagger
    towards the imps and press B; Conker will unzip his flies and begin to urinate
    over them; this kills them. Kill as many as you can, but if you stop your
    "attack", you must find the Context Zone by the First Aid kit and this will
    stop you being drunk (using a pill). You must begin again if this happens.
    After enough imps are dead, the remaining two will jump inside the boiler.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 5/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Run to one of the four corners, and stand on the cross sign. Wait for the
    boiler to run towards you and jump, pulling the switch when he is on the grille
    nearest to you. Sewage will pour out from above him, soaking him. Before he can
    recover, run forward and press B; you will attack his ... how do I put this
    politely? ... Attributes. Do this three more times to kill the boiler. The imps
    now blow it up accidentally. You will notice the things you attacked lying
    around; roll one towards the slight hollow with a chocolate square over it,
    opening a door. Get the other and roll it through the door, killing a guard and
    opening the way to the safe, collecting - TEN dollars????
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 2/5
    Go outside and argue with the Catfish until - guess what - the Dogfish breaks
    free; start swimming as fast as you can (the Catfish are all eaten). Make it to
    the pier and you will get a cinema where the dogfish chases Conker up the pier
    in Jaws fashion, crashing into a wall. Now use the dogfish as a platform to
    reach three hundred dollars. You've earned it!
    Now leave the level and make your way up to the door you opened with the dung
    ball; go through.
    5.6 SLOPRANO************************************************************
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Talk to the Dung Beetle. Now find sweetcorn (its found round all the round
    holes with hands appearing out of them) and run towards the centre of the room,
    throwing them into the goo. There's one at the first, two at the second and
    three at the third; at this point, the Beast of Poo Mountain will appear and
    start to sing.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 3/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Avoid the beast's attacks and wait for him to start singing. Stand ont the
    context pad and - when he opens his mouth - throw in a toilet roll (you will
    need to keep moving around as he has three different locations). After one hit,
    your context pad will be covered up; move round to the next section (the area
    where you got two sweetcorns) and dish out two hits in the same fashion. The
    last section is over a gaping chasm, which you must helicopter spin over. Three
    hits later and he will sing so loud that he breaks a glass wall, leading to a
    wad of cash and a flush. Pull the flush, after avoiding more attacks, and the
    beast is flushed away (in a homage to The Wizard of Oz: "I'm flushing,
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 4/5
    Now for the hard part; do not attempt the next section unless you have at least
    $1000. Drop down the giant toilet, using the platforms and run into a hole. Now
    grab the extra life (and do so each time you die), as this next section is
    going to cost you a few.
    Dive underwater and swim towards the fans. You must pass them without being it,
    because if you do you will be sliced in half and will lose a life however much
    energy you have. After that, surface and head through a passage. Jump to the
    rope (missing will get you sliced and diced). At the top, avoid more blades
    which - although harmless looking, are also deadly to the touch. Climb up the
    Difficulty: 0/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 0/5
    This is a funny bit; simply go up to the Panther King's guards, who have been
    sent to look for a squirrel. Well, actually there is just one guard; the other
    is having a number two behind a rock.
    I've not really explained the cut scenes yet, so I'll tell you the story so
    far. The Panther King has a leg too short on his table, and his chief scientist
    has suggested the guards capture a squirrel, who will be forced to hold it up.
    The guard asks if you're a squirrel, but Conker tricks him into thinking he's
    an elephant. Once you're past, the money is returned to you and you continue to
    the next section.
    5.7 UGA BUGA************************************************************
    Run towards the castle, and avoid the raptors; go in the door at the back;
    continue, going through another door, until you reach the top. Grab the money
    and jump on top of the statue's head. A lightbulb appears; press B and Conker
    will turn into an anvil; do this repeatedly until you knock the statue down to
    the floor below; do it once more, opening the door underneath; now, pass the
    Rock Monsters and push the rock through the tunnel you created and kill some
    Uga Bugas, opening a door through to the room where the Uga Bugas are
    worshipping a dinosaur.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 3/5
    Run past the Uga Bugas and through the door at the right, to the back of the
    room. Hit the Uga Bugas in your way and go to the giant egg. Another Monk is
    next to it, so make him flip you on top of the egg, where a lightbulb appears.
    Press B and Conkler will start to hatch the egg. Time cut to later and the egg
    hatches a Raptor. Get it to follow you along the bit of path you didn't take
    before; be patient, as the raptor is very slow, but will eat all Uga Bugas on
    the path. Lead him back into the room and stand on the Context Zone; look at
    the switches to either side of the door you first entered through; fire at the
    right one and the large presser will rise off the stone slab in front of you;
    lead the Raptor onto this and leave him there (I suggest you jump off to the
    side so he doesn't follow). Stand on teh Context Zone and hit the other switch,
    sending the presser hurtling down, killing the Raptor :*(
    The giant dinosaur is pleased, though. He will roll out his tongue, and a monk
    will appear.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 3/5
    Gore: 0/5
    The problem now is getting up the dinosaur's tongue. Annoy the monk as usual
    and get flipped onto the head of the dinosaur (hold up on the joystick as you
    are flung across the room). Go past his head and get the money and 1 up. Now
    stand by one of the dinosaur's nostrils; when steam momentarily stops coming
    out, drop into it and press B; Conker will toss pepper into the nostril; repeat
    on the other side, causing the dinosaur to sneeze. His tongue will now be dry,
    so you can walk up it and into his mouth; go through, avoiding his swinging
    tonsils and find the dead Uga Buga on the other side; Conker will don his
    bearskin. Now go back the way you came.
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    The Uga Bugas will now worship you; lead them back to the Rock Monsters (you
    will need to be pateint here, and make sure all four follow you; lead them to
    the bottom of the slope and wait until they are all round you before running
    up, or some will be trapped below. Hit a rock monster, then the Ugas will kill
    it; do the same for all of them, and then talk the Bouncer at Rock Solid into
    letting you in.
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 4/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Without doubt, this is the most frustrating section of the game so far. As you
    will see, the Rock Monsters have Berri in a cage. Go in and find the rock
    behind the bar; roll it up to the pad by the bouncer, opening a door. Go to the
    beer barrel by the bar and get drunk (use the context zone). Go to the Rock Man
    nearest the door and press B to urinate, then hold Z to push him further back;
    with practise you can roll him through the door; if you don't make it, press B
    and get away from him as fast as you can as he'll be furious (who wouldn't if
    someone's just taken a leak on them?) and will try to hit you. This is easier
    said then done, as Conker moves ridiculously slowly while drunk.
    If you take too long, your bladder will be empty and you must take the alka
    selzer (by the slope onto the table) and start again. Once you're successful,
    grab the alka seltzer and run into the door; immediately tail spin (A twice) to
    slow down your descent or you will lose energy. Roll the rock man (still rolled
    up) to the right. The only problem is the two rock women who keep moving in and
    out, but you will notice that when they move in, they will alternately wait a
    short time (too short to pass) before emerging and then a long time (long
    enough to pass). Once you get the hang of this, it should be easy to judge
    their actions. If you are hit, you fall, you lose energy, and the Rock Man
    recovers, meaning you must start again. Roll the rock man onto a switch that
    opens the two other doors. You must now use the same method to knock the
    remaining two rock men through the doors where the smash, opening Berri's cage,
    but - being a bit short sighted, and not recognising you in your disguise, she
    ignores you. Grab the money in her cage and chase her, but the bouncer stops
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    The bouncer will take you to the weasels, where the boss evidently has Berri as
    his bit on the side. She says she doesn't know you. The boss now beats Paulie
    (the weasel in red) to death and tells Conker he can keep the money if he
    carries a bomb into the Uga Bugas' lair.
    This is easy; simply run back to the giant dinosaur, through to the dead Uga
    Buga and drop it off the edge; the lava will rise, but it will reveal stepping
    stones to a door. Go through.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Conker is beaten unconsious; when he wakes he finds that four Uga Bugas have
    taken his money; one of them (called Simon) falls off his sled, sothe others
    will challenge you to race them to get it back. Run up the slope ahead and
    climb onto the board; simply follow the course round, avoiding the brontosaurus
    feet (see above for how to control the board). When you catch up with one of
    them, press B to hit him. Be warned, though; after two hits, the gate just afer
    the second brontosaurus will move to the left fork; hitting it, or any wall
    will kill you; a small scape wil cost you energy. Three hits and the left fork
    opens again; to finish, head down the left fork and go onto the wall that's
    sticking out (you can ride up this), then jump to the money and go through the
    gap in the wall.
    Here is a rough map of the course. The level goes across in a continuous loop.
    		| |			|	End
    		| |			|				|
    		| |			|				|
    		| |			|-------------|
    		| |			|	||			|
    		| |			|	||Wall		|
    		| |	_______|____________	|______
    		|_______Bridge________________ |
    					|				|	  | |
    					|				|	  | |
    					|___________	|	 /	/
    								  \ \	/  /
    								  | Fork |
    								  |		  |
    								  |			|
    								  |			|
    								  |			|
    								  |			|
    								  |			|
    								 /			 \
    								 |			  |
    								 |    ||	  |
    								 |	   ||
    								 |	   ||	  |
    								 |			  |
    								  \			 /
    								   |		|
    									Lava Fall
    								  /			  \
    								 /				\
    								|				|
    								|			    |
    							    | |_______|	 |
    								|  |		|	 |
    								|  |		Brontosaurus
    								|  |		|	 |
    											Start point
    You will end up in a stadium, where the Uga Buga leader (Buga) is watching.
    Actually, this is a gladiatoral arena.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 3/5
    Run over to the large gate and a raptor appears; run away, as if it grabs you
    you lose two energy points. Get to the B pad and face the rqaptor, then press
    B; Conker will hypnotise it and leap on. Run to an Uga Buga and the Raptor will
    grab him in its mouth; then, press B to swallow him. After the first six are
    eaten, the infantry will be sent in. these all have clubs, so when you get one,
    run to teh other side of the arena to eat him or his comrades will attack you,
    knocking you off and you will have to hypnotise the Raptor again - only this
    time you must stop when he is hypnotised (use B) and jump on his back before he
    comes round; all the Uga Bugas you ate will come back to life if this happens.
    After this, there will be two waves of six Uga Bugas with spears. If you are
    low on energy there is chocolate round the sides of the arena (just don't fall
    in the lava).
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 5/5
    Gore: 3/5
    Now Buga will face you. Simply jump to avoid his shock waves and wait for him
    to raise his club. Before he can hit you, use B to bite his wedding tackle. Do
    not worry about falling off as the Raptor is now your friend. When his
    loincloth falls down, run to the other side and press B to bite his derriere.
    After three times, his loincloth snaps, revealing his - well, it's blurred out,
    but it is very small. The leader runs away in embarrassment.
    Go in the door the Uga Bugas emerged from after getting rid of the raptor
    (Conker throws him a bone). Talk to Jugga, the well - endowed woman (who,
    sadly, turns you down), then go after the money; it ends up along the passage
    beyond, then return to the lift that has appeared and exit by dropping down the
    large bowl that doesn't have blades down (and has a sign reading "DANGER: POO",
    and exit through Sloprano.
    5.8 WINDY (3)***********************************************************
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Go back to Mrs. Bee and her hive has been stolen again; go back to where it was
    before; firstly, high jump through the upper left gap and them jump over to the
    gap nearby, finding some money. Now, go in the main door (this was blocked
    before by a hidden monster) and find the hive. Jump in and blast all the Wasps
    using the Turret (see Special Moves, above, for Turret Controls). When they are
    dead (use the radar to see where they are), carry the hive back before you are
    stung to death. Mrs. Bee gives you $400.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Go up the slope towards the windmill, avoiding the killer worms and speak to
    the barrel. If you're told you don't have enough money, use the money locations
    section to help locate the rest. If you have enough, jump on and use the
    control stick to guide it down the hill, killing the worms. At the bottom,
    Conker is hurled off, knocking himself out until nightfall. Enter the door at
    the end of the river.
    5.9 SPOOKY**************************************************************
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 4/5
    Go through the mineshaft and swim through the river until you find a door
    ahead; on the otehr side, jump and grab the switch, that opens the door to the
    graveyard. Go back and find the reaper. Talk to him and he gives you a gun to
    deal with the zombies.
    Go to the gate and enter; four zombies will appear, which you must shoot; press
    B to get out the gun, and Z to fire it.
    This is hard - until you realise they cannot get you when you are standing on a
    gravestone. With the gun put away, do a high jump, preferably when the zombies
    are far away, then take it out and use R to go into aiming mode, then hold Z
    for the laser sight. Zombies can only be killed by a shot to the head. They
    will either run at you or crawl (if badly hurt). When none appear, run further
    down the path and get onto a gravestone ASAP when you hear a moaning noise;
    when you have killed, the Reaper will appear again and open the gate for you.
    jo_1954@hotmail.com writes: " you can get the zombies in the graveyard to come
    outside in the area where Gregg the Grim Reaper is swiping at the catfish...
    lead them to the water where they will try to get you and die.. after 12 are
    dead you can get to the reaper at the other end of the graveyard... but
    becareful... the zombies are still out there... but you have killed 12 in less
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 5/5
    Go through the gate and up the path, avoiding the skeletal worms, as they can
    throw you down a bottomless pit. When one appears retreat, then use the
    helicoptery tail move to get over them.
    Eventually you will reach Batula's castle; after a long cinema, and pastiche on
    Bram Stoker's Dracula, in which Batula reveals himself to be Conker's undead
    ancestor, you and Batula will turn into bats. You must collect villagers and
    fly them to Batula, where they will be dropped into his grinder and their blood
    pumped up to him via a tap.
    Keep holding Z and using the control stick to fly. To collect a villager, avoid
    his spears, then press Z to drop guano, hopefully stunning him. Immediately let
    go of B to land and run into the villager, automaticaqlly picking him up, then
    fly fast back to the Grinder, automatically dropping the villager in.
    Most villagers can be found in the hallway and the garden, but one each is
    found at the top of the stairs and the library. To help, here is a rough map of
    the castle.
    			|															  |
    			|					GARDEN									  |
    			|															  |
    			|															  |
    			|															  |
    			|															  |
    			|															  |
    			|															  |
    			|															  |
    			|		__________________		_________________	  |
    			|		|											   |	  |
    			|		|											   |	  |
    			| Spike|											   |	  |
    			|pit	|		______________________________	   | Pit |
    			|		|		|								  |	   |	  |
    __________|		|		|____________________________|	   |	  |_______
    |					|											   |			   |
    |	Library		|										X	   |		Dining|
    |																	 Pit	Hall	   |
    |		B pad								Batula							B pad |   |																				
    ||																				  |	
    |																				   ||					|					GRINDER					|			  |
    |___________		|	__________________________________		|___   _____|
    			  |		|												|	|  |
    			  |		|												|	|  |
    			  |		|		__________		_________________	|___   |
    			  |		|		|		   |	|				   |	|      |
    			  |		|					|	|						|	 ___|	
    			  |		|					|	|						|	 |
    			  |							Stairs						|	 |
    			  |____													 |
    			  		|												____|
    			  		|												|
                		|												|	
    			  		|												|
    			  		|_______________Main hall________________|
    Ignore the B pads for now (found on a bookcase and above the Dining Hall);
    these will be used later. Where the X is, there can be found a supply of three
    chocolate squares, but these do not regenerate once eaten.
    After three villagers are dead, Batula's rope will begin to fray, but - like
    Marvin - he won't give in, asking you for more. After eight villagers are dead,
    Batula will fall into his own trap, killing himself.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 4/5
    More Zombies will appear. The aim here is to get out of the castle (which is
    locked). Go to the main hall, and kill the two zombies you will find (use your
    shotgun); run along the passage towards the library, where another two zombies
    await. Three more zombies are in the library; to kill them, stand at the bottom
    of the stairs (on your right as you enter), as they cannot get you here. Put
    away the gun and run further until you can tail spin to the middle bookshelf;
    use the Context Zone and use the knives to kill all four bats (one from each
    corner). The one to the left of the door leading to the grinder will attack
    first; then, rotate anti - clockwise until you see each new one.
    Conntinue until you reach the second floor in the grinder room and run round
    (clockwise) until you reach the door to the Dining Hall. Two Zomies lie in wait
    on the balcony, so beware.
    Run to the Context Zone and kill three bats, then cross the rafters to the key,
    then return to the door with it (N.B. if you didn't kill the bats, they will
    attack you).
    Get to the door by going back the way you came, via the library; be careful in
    the passage to the hall as one of the zombies will have reappeared.
    After using the first key, run towards the Dining Hall; there are actually
    three corners in the corridor; around the first corner are three zombies;
    continue after killing them and kill two more, plus four in the Dining Hall.
    Run up the stairs to where the bottomless pit now has a bridge over it and run
    through the maze to the centre, killing zombies (simply run forward, take the
    first left, go left and then take the next right to Count Conkula's tomb. Kill
    both zombies, then jump onto the hedge and kill the one on the other side. Grab
    the key behind the tomb and run to escape the one that has just appeared.
    Go back to the hall and use the key; a ladder will appear by the door leading
    from the Grinder to the second floor of the Dining Hall. Climb it to find three
    chocolate squares. Use your helicoptery tail to jump from the ladder to the
    platform on the other side of the door and make your way to the lever, opening
    a secret passage from this room to the Great Hall. Go the other way and use
    Batula's tap as a platform to jump over to where the third key is.
    Take the key along the ledge to the door you opened and run through, avoiding
    Zombies, until you reach - and open - the door.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 2/5
    Jump on Mr. Barrel, who has taken up residence here, and roll out the door.
    Roll down the path up to the castle, killing Worms, but also being careful not
    to fall off, or you will lose a life. Roll through the graveyard and down past
    where Mr. Reaper was. Instead of going back the way you came, go towards the
    strong current to your right; at the end, Mr. Barrel will be killed, but you
    will be able to exit, finding $100.
    You will find yourself in the first area (Hungover). Take the same route out
    (except without the Gargoyle or other obstacles).
    5.11 IT'S WAR!**********************************************************
    A black - and white sequence will appear with the Grey Squirrel Sergeant asking
    squirrels to join the army and fight the Evil Tediz.
    Run to the sign and go left (along the "Nasty" route). A door will have opened
    behind the barbed wire; go in and meet the General, after seeing a cut scene
    with a plane crashing.
    The Sergeant will tell you to get rid of the plane.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Jump into the water; find the electric eel and dive, then swim through one of
    the arch - like structures in the water. The eel should follow you, powering it
    up. Swim through three and the eel will die, but the area will be powered up,
    revealing a Context Pad.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 3/5
    Ignore it for now and go up the slope with TNT written by it, to the toilet.
    Press B to knock and a creature will come out with a TNT barrel on its back. Go
    back down and push the crate nearby so it is in front of the steps. Now go back
    and push the creature along and down a slope; if the crate is there it will
    stop the creature from being killed. Take the creature in either direction
    until it stops by the plane.
    Going left involves passing a lot of bouncing crates and cranes that pick up
    and drop crates - if one hits the TNT, it will explode and yo must start again.
    The other route passes loads of Spider mines, which appear only whne you get
    close and explode on contact. When you get one to the end, go to the Context
    Pad and take out your catapult; fire it at the TNT barrel, blowing it up. Go
    back to the toilet and repeat on the other side, then blow it up, getting rid
    of the plane.
    Go to the Sergeant, who is by a boat, and he will knock you out.
    Difficulty: 2/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 5/5
    You will wake up on the boat, with several grey squirrels. You will land at the
    Tediz base; watch the cinema, then run into the base, avoiding enemy fire until
    you meet a Grey squirrel, who tells you to go in and take out the Tediz -
    before getting shot. Take his machine gun, and use it (press B, then use Z to
    fire, as with the shotgun), and then hold R for aiming mode, to blast the lock
    on the door.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 5/5
    In the room you enter, four Tediz will appear; shoot them all, and a door at
    the back opens, revealing lasers. These will sap two energy bars with one hit.
    Press Z to crawl and crawl under them. Go past the corner and draw your gun
    again; one Teddy will appear out from behind the next crate, then two from the
    one after that. Grab the chocolate, then turn a corner, killing another Teddy
    and the one behind the lasers. To pass them, high jump (Z and A) and tail spin
    over them, then get out your gun ready for three Tediz. Avoid the steam coming
    out of the pipe, then keep your gun out and go under the highest opints of the
    next two laser beams, wsatchin out for Tediz coming out of the ceiling. At the
    end of the corridor, get in the lift (well, the cinema shows you doing it),
    avoiding the Spiders just in time.
    There is another floor to do, and this is harder still. The main problem is the
    creatures that wield flamethrowers; they cannot be killed; simply wait for
    their flames to stop temporarily and then get past.
    Difficulty: 3/5
    Rudeness: 2/5
    Gore: 3/5
    Simply kill all the Tediz surgeons that are running around, trying to hit you
    with scalpels. When all of them are dead, talk to the Grey squirrel who is
    trapped in an electric chair. The left switch will fry - but not kill - him,
    while the right one opens the next door.
    This leads to the leader of the Tediz. He is in a turret gun, and will
    repeatedly fire, giving you only a few seconds in between; using the crates as
    corver, run towards him and head right where you will find a rope; when he
    stops quickly climb it and jump to the platform overhead, then get to the
    Context Zone where you will take a Hand Cannon; quickly aim it at the boss and
    fire with Z, blowing him to bits; if you take too long you wil be hit, costing
    two energy squares.
    Imeediately jump into the now vacant gun turret and shoot all the Tediz that
    appear out of each corridor; if you get low on energy, jump out and collect the
    chocolate nearby. Use the machine gun if necessary. When all the Tediz are
    dead, a door will open that you can pass through.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 3/5
    You will see Rodent being shot at by Tediz; shoot all the Tediz and talk to
    Rodent. He has on a special vest that makes him impervious to attack. Take him
    along the next section and watch out for attacks, such as bombs. If you hear a
    high - pitched sound a Spider Mine is coming, so hide behind Rodent; same for
    At the end, go and jump in the raft and press B. Aim at the locks with your
    Hand Cannon and quickly blast them off (the red things around the big lock).
    the only problem is the army of Tediz around you. Afterwards, nip through the
    door, and get in the tank with Rodent. Blast away the small sign with the
    nuclear symbol on it.
    Difficulty: 1/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 0/5
    Run along the passage, jumping over the acid, then jumping back to avoid the
    mines. At the end, jump up and pull the lever to open the large gate outside,
    then run back, as the acid is flooding the tunnel.
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 3/5
    This is very tough. Run through the gate and tail spin over the gap by the
    raised bridge; avoid the Teddy and run up the bridge, pressing B to lower it.
    Run back to the Tank as the Tediz watchtower has a rotating gun turret that
    fires missiles at you and once you are caught in its blasts your energy can
    drain away to zero in a matter of seconds. Take the tank along the path,
    shooting any Tediz. Once across the bridge, aim at the nearest support (the
    yellow base) of the tower and fire at it, destroying it. Continue and jump out
    of the tank when you reach the next raised bridge, making sure you are not on a
    slope, as if left alone the tank will slide down and crash into the pit below.
    Open the second bridge as before, then aim at the next tower support. Get round
    to the last raised bridge and do the same, then drive onto the last platform,
    shooting all the Tediz, and take out the other two supports. The tower will
    collapse and a bridge will be formed. Jump out of the tank and cross the bridge
    to safety; fall down the hole to the next section.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    You will meet a small girl chipmunk, who knows all about missiles and wants to
    be saved.
    You will see that there are three arches on the platform; run to the left one
    and run up the pier to the Context Zone. Use the hand cannon to shoot the
    submarine; however, it will keep firing missiles at you. When one is launhced,
    press B and run. If ou are hit, each arch has chocolate under it which
    regenerates (thankfully). Hit the submarine and another will appear, so
    dcestroy that. Now run to the next pier (clockwise) where there are two
    submarines; this makes it trickier. On the last pier there are three.
    If you fall in the water, there are ladders to help you out, but it is
    advisable to swim around a bit so you are not in the direct line of fire.
    Difficulty: 4/5
    Rudeness: 2/5
    Gore: 2/5
    When all the submarines are destroyed you will receive a cinema. Go to the
    rabbit. At that point, Rodent will return and try to warn you (in slow -
    motion). The rabbit will spin her head round exorcist - style and then reveal
    that she is the glove puppet of a giant Robo - Teddy. Jump into the tank with
    Rodent and the Girl/Teddy will reveal a pair of giant cannons.
    Quickly take cover under the nearest arch and aim the cannon (with C) so it is
    facing towards the robot. Wait until there is a lull in the firing and quickly
    come out and fire at both cannons. The robot will come at you, but shoot the
    girl and the robot will turn to pick her up; after the cut scene, shoot the
    button that appears on the robot's back. If you are too slow, the robot will
    pick you up and throw you to the ground like King Kong, costing you energy.
    After one hit the robot gets out lasers; these are easy to hit; repeat the
    above process of shooting the girl, then get under cover as the robot unleashes
    its deadliest weapon yet; mark 2 cannons. Wait until it stops firing and shoot
    each cannon twice, then hit the girl again and hit the Robot's back to destroy
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 2/5
    Now the girl sends out her "children" - two mines to be exact, which destroy
    the tank; you cannot avoid this. The tank is destroyed and Rodent is
    (apparently) killed :*(.
    The girl has one last trick up her sleeve; she sets the base to self - destruct
    (you have four and a half minutes to leave). All that has gone before will seem
    like a walk in the park prepared to this next bit; run through the hole in the
    floor and you will be back in the tunnels. The only problem is there are now
    twice as many lasers as before and there is NO chocolate.
    To tackle the first lot, jump over the first laser on the ground; you can pass
    the second by walking, then jump the last; jumping too early here will lead to
    you being hit by an overhead beam.
    The next three can be got past using the helicoptery tail thing, but the fourth
    in this sequence is too far to twirl over, so land before it and simply run
    under at its highest point.
    Now comes a tricky part; there is a pattern of beams something like the one
    		X	X	X
    				X	X	X
    	The Xs represent vertical beams.
    Enter on the left, jumping the first beam, then jump to the right, as walking
    will somehow cause ou to trip the second horizontal beam, then jump over the
    second horizontal beam.
    Run to the right of the pipe, then jump over the two beams ahead, and high jump
    and tail spin over the large wall of beams. Quickly press B to get out your
    guns as two Tediz will appear round the corner.
    After they are dead you will come to a pair of beams by some crates; climb onto
    the lowest crate and crawl along, missing the beams. Kill the Teddy round the
    next corner.
    After that comes a tricky bit; jump onto the crate and trip one beam (there may
    be a way to not do this, but I haven't found it), then get as close o the edge
    of the crate as you can and jump and you should miss all other beams. Crawl
    under the last set of beams, and run towards the exit but DON'T leave; as you
    reach it, a pair of deadly blue beams will appear in front of it. Quickly jump
    to the nearest crate and press B to get out your hand cannon, disposing of all
    four Tediz that have appeared; the last will break the lasers and allow you to
    Mercifully, Rare realised that making you replay all this again would be far
    too cruel, and set the game so you restart from past the door every time you
    die (we are not worthy!) They will also give you two minutes remaining here
    however much or little you had left on your clock when you left the bunker.
    Now for the even harder bit. Grab chocolate if needed, then make your way back
    to the beach - which would be easy if it weren't for all the Tediz, who are now
    equipped with Hand Cannons. Run forward and turn right; take out you hand
    cannon and kill the Teddy coming at you; put it away then run to the next T -
    junction, then take it out and kill both Tediz (I suggest you stay on the
    right, kill the one on the right, then pan round and kill the other. The next
    four Tediz are best avoided by running past them; you will know when you have
    beaten them as a cinema will appear and Conker will get in the boat.
    Difficulty: 0/5
    Rudeness: 1/5
    Gore: 0/5
    You will sail back on the boat; Rodent turns out to be alive, but is trapped in
    the Tediz base. But amazingly - thanks to his suit - he survives the blast,
    despite being hurled through the air.
    5.12 HEIST**************************************************************
    Difficulty: 0/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 1/5
    Back in Windy you will find the Queen Bee is dead, the reason being that the
    windmill has fallen on her hive. Go to where the windmill was and you will find
    Rodent, who - guess what - crashed into the windmill. Conker and rodent will
    talk, then Rodent will leave.
    Run into the remains of the Windmill and go through the door where you meet the
    Weasel boss and Berri, who now recognises you. Your job here is to rob the
    Feral Reserve Bank.
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 0/5
    Gore: 4/5
    Conker and Berri, dressed in slinky black outfits, will walk into the bank
    (sort of like a modern version of Bonnie & Clyde, really). Conker's bag sets
    off an alarm, but Conker and Berri kill the guards. Now head towards the lasers
    (don't touch) and Berri will begin running back and forth, shooting guards.
    Stand by a pillar and wait until the guards stop shooting (you will hear a cry
    of "regroup") and then press B. Conker will somersault across the room in slow
    motion. Use Z to shoot both guards. Two more will appear; repeat and Berri will
    break the lasers.
    This process must be repeated THREE times and the number of guards keeps
    increasing. Also be warned; they will often blast way the pillars so be quick
    to kill them when you get the chance as there is NO extra chocolate on this
    level. This bit took me longer to do than any other bit of the game.
    Difficulty: 5/5
    Rudeness: 2/5
    Gore: 2/5
    Finally you will get past and enter a new room full of lasers; although it
    looks like a tribute to Entrapment is about to ensue, Berri simply turns them
    off. Enter a new room full of money. Exceept this must be stunned with the
    frying pan as they run around the place. Stun three and the scene will cut to
    some time later, when Conker has $1 million!!!
    However, the Fabled Panther King will now appear and guess what - the Weasel
    Boss works for him. The boss kills Berri (snifffff! :*() when she tries to
    protect Conker from being used to hold up the King's table. Now the Professor
    will appear and announce a new experiment - growing an alien INSIDE the Panther
    King. Guess what; a parody of Aliens ensues, with the Panther King dying when
    an alien appears out of his chest. The Professor now launches the vault into
    The first thing to do is IMMEDIATELY run to the switch and open the airlock,
    sucking out the Panther King's body.
    Jump off and run round the room, avoiding the alien as one hit will kill you
    outright even if you have a full energy bar. Run to the yellow Robot Suit.
    The alien will now bend over Berri's body; "Get away from her, you b****!" says
    Conker, before Berri is pulled out, followed by the Professor.
    Now you must get rid of the alien. Go up to it and press B repeatedly to punch
    it; this is very hard and half the time you will probably end up being attacked
    yourself. When you finally do get a punch in, keep going until the alien is
    temporarily stunned. Then run to its tail and you should automatically grab it.
    Now comes a near copy of the Bowser battles on Super Mario 64; rotate the
    control stick to swing the alien and wait until it is off the ground and going
    fast before throwing it at the airlock, but it manages to get back in and is
    stronger. The next time you attack it you should press A to use your jetpacks
    at it tries to whip you with its tail and then immediately start attacking.
    This is a very hard manoevre that may take a while to get right. If it swings
    its tail at you, press A and if it tries to bite you press Z to duck, which
    will momentarily stun it, the best time to start hitting it repeatedly. Once it
    is stunned repeat the process of throwing it out and - guess what - it gets
    back in again.
    Do this twice more; each time it gets harder and will dodge a lot of your shots
    on the last go.
    Then, the alien will stop in the airlock and attack Conker, before everything
    freezes up.
    Conker steps out of his suit (he is somehow back in his normal clothes now) and
    says the game's frozen. He will get a computer programmer to tamper with the
    game, allowing him to select a weapon (he chooses the sabre) and change the
    background so he is in the Panther King's Throne Room, where the alien becomes
    unfrozen and Conker decapitates it. He then realises at the last moment he
    should have bought Berri back, but it is too late; he is crowned King and
    doesn't enjoy it.
    There's a moral here somewhere...
    Change your character by pressing left and right to view the selection (you can
    get more by using cheats).
    Also, add CPU controlled characters with up and down; the default setting is
    1v1, but having extra characters makes it more fun (and challenging).
    6.1 SETUP***************************************************************
    Change difficulty levels of compuer controlled players; from easiest to
    hardest, these are:
    Inbred, (r@p, Normal, 8@$+@rd, Einstein
    Turn on or off; this shows you where the enemies are.
    Sets a time limit; but time is unlimited iif you go for a set number of lives.
    Decide number of lives. Infinite if you use a time limit.
    Set victory condition limit to a set number of points.
    Set victory condition to numer of bags retrieved (only available in Heist).
    In death matches, set victory condition to number of kills (displayed at top of
    In Race, set victory conditon to number of laps.
    If you have a friend, this allows him/her to control the turret in tank mode.
    6.2 TEAM GAMES**********************************************************
    6.2.1 BEACH
    If you play as the Frenchies; your mission is to avoid the Tediz and get on the
    truck (found in caves under the Tediz base) and get to Paris. Power Boost pills
    give a temporary speed boost and the dynamite plunger will kill all the Tediz
    in one go.
    Power boost pills are found to the sides about half way along; the best way is
    to head towards the right and stay there - there are less missiles coming that
    way; there are some pills to grab. To get to the plunger, run along the ditch
    and follow the path over the main area; there are two walls that can be used to
    protect against the Tediz; run to the second and drop off to the left; to
    activate the plunger, jump on it. If you are around for too long (more than 1
    1/2 minutes) you will be zapped somehow.
     If you're one of the Tediz, simply use the turret gun to stop the Frenchies
    (this is in my opinion harder).
    You can have up to about six Frenchies, but no more than two Tediz; Tediz score
    points for killing Frenchies; Frenchies score points for how many Tediz they
    kill and how many of their number survive.
    There is no radar on this game.
    6.2.2 RAPTOR
    You play as a Uga or a Raptor. If you're a Uga, you must get a Raptor egg, take
    it to the giant frying pan and cook it. The Raptor must eat as many Ugas as
    possible (controls as in Special Moves section, above).
    Ugas have access to weapons, but cannot use any when holding an egg; CPU -
    controlled Raptors normally run through the lower floor of the temple, so if
    you carry an egg up the path and through the upper area you should avoid them.
    Likewise, CPU controlled Ugas stick to the lower area of the temple.
    Playing as the raptor is easier; score one point for killing a caveman and
    another for taking him to the baby raptor (the same one Conker sacrifices) and
    letting him eat.
    You can have up to six (I think) Ugas but no more than two raptors.
    Raptors show up as red on your radar, Ugas green.
    6.2.3 WAR
    Play as either the squirrels or the Tediz. You can have up to six on each side
    (but numbers are always equal). Squirrels are green on the radar, Tediz red. Total War
    Play with the Grey Squirrels versus the Tediz; get the enemy's chemical
    canister and plug it in at the sewers, killing all the adverseries.
    You cannot get your own. The best way is to simply run to the enemy's base and
    grab their canister then run down to the sewers (accessed off each base). Then
    stay where you are. If someone else gets the canister, find a gas mask
    collection point (blocked up until they are needed).
    You score points for enemies killed, so if none are killed by the canister, you
    get no points.
    You can access the Tediz base by either going out the main door, using the back
    door or using the sewers.
    Note: If you have a gas mask on, do not grab a weapon until the gas is gone; if
    you do you lose the gas mask. Colours
    Go to the enemy base and capture their flag, then take it back to your base
    without being hit. The flag is located down a passageway from the gun turrets.
    Capture the flag enough times to win (killing enemies here does not earn you
    The flag is shown as white on your radar.
    6.3 SINGLE PLAYER GAMES*************************************************
    In single player games, press right to increase number of enemies.
    6.3.1 HEIST
    You play one of a gang of weasels performing a bank heist; the idea is to grab
    the bag of money and take it back to your base (your starting point). The first
    to get three bags wins; press B to drop the bag if necessary, and use weapons
    (see below for how to use them) against the other weasels. To find your base,
    follow the arrows.
    This is actually quite hard, as you have to get right back to base before
    dumping the money; not far enough and you can still have it taken off you.
    Also, you cannot use weapons while holding the money.
    The game is set to play as Paulie (the weasel in red), but you can choose
    between all four weasels.
    6.3.2 TANK
    Simpler than Heist, you control the Grey Squirrels or Tediz. Drive your tank to
    the bridge in the cenre and pick up the Chemical Canister, then return to your
    silo, where you will automatically set off the canister, killing anyone still
    outside. When it is set off, a countdown appears, so if someone else gets it,
    go back to base immediately. You can use hardware pick ups on this game (see
    Getting the canister is quite easy, although making sure the enemy is outside
    when you set it off is not.
    6.3.3 RACE
    Simply finish first; pick from two courses. Use the same controls as shown
    above for the jetski; be warned; if you crash three times, you die. Play as
    Ugas; this is the same course as in the game.
    6.3.4 DEATH MATCH
    The most fun game of all, simply kill as many Tediz/Weasels/ugas as you can.
    There are five courses: Temple
    A primitive course; you can choose between playing as any Uga, or playing as
    the Raptor and eating as many Ugas as you can (but you cannt use weapons). The
    area is very straightforward.
    The same course used in Heist, this uses the weasels - although (with no
    cheats) you can choose between Paulie, a Security guard, a Grey Squirrel, a
    Tediz or a Frenchy (same choices as in all deathmatches other than Temple).
    The vault has two hard - to - reach sniper platforms, reached by jumping up
    from the second level and running through a door. Total War
    Fight against the Tediz (playing as a Grey Squirrel - or one of the other
    available characters, including a Teddy). This mainly takes place around the
    fortress - like building. There is a large hole you can fall down if you're not
    careful, though. Colours
    There are two bases; simply run between run to another. To get the chainsaw,
    run into one of the doors at either end of the field, and you get to a bridge
    with it on. Each base also has three lookout points, one with a big gun on that
    you can use. Bunker
    The best course; this has the extra excitement of flame switches (these set
    light to the area behind you when you stand on them), an electric switch
    (electrifies one area) and best of all, the lavatory. To find this, follow the
    signs with male/female symbols on. Inside you can't use your weapons, but
    pressing B releases your other "weapon". Press Z to fire bodily fluids all over
    the place (great fun; and these will also sap the Tediz' lives.)
    6.4 WEAPONS*************************************************************
    All weapons can be taken out and put away with B, and used with Z.
    Baseball Bat/Bone Bat
    In the Vault and Temple, you start off with these. Pretty useless, though as
    they are just short range and do little damage.
    Machine Gun/Semi - Auto Rifle
    The best ones are the lighter ones with higher firepower. Holding R allows for
    targetting mode. These need to be reloaded with A. Both allow strafing.
    Bazooka/Tommy Gun
    Similar to the above, except they do not need to be reloaded. Both allow
    Set light to an enemy, but take a while to kill them at full health. Be careful
    you don't get too close, or you will be set light to. Allows strafing. Hold Z
    down for a bigger flame.
    Bone Crossbow
    Fairly accurate, but very heavy. C up and down zooms in and out of aiming mode.
    It also allows strafing.
    Slash or decapitate your opponents; close range.
    Throwing Knives
    An infinite supply of knives to throw at your enemies; this has a very long
    range. C up and down zooms in and out. Allows strafing.
    My favourite weapon; decapitates and kills your opponents however much energy
    they have, but is close range.
    Hand Cannon
    I'd advise using this unless you're an expert, since it is heavy ("big *&+%£*
    *!(^£*" as the Weasels call it). Its effects are by far the most gory of all
    weapons, but icf you get too close to your target, you get blown to bits as
    well. A reloads manually. Allows strafing.
    Rock Bombs/Hand Grenades/Black Bombs
    Speak for themselves; press C up or down to throw. Allows strafing. Don't hold
    on for too long though or you'll blow yourself up.
    Turret Gun
    Very impressive; jump in and out with A; reload with B, fire with Z. There have
    a long range and can be moved around with the control stick. Make sure no - one
    sneaks up behind you, however.
    $100 found behind the waterfall, after exiting Spooky.
    $100 for rescuing the Queen Bee's hive.
    $100 in the passages under the poo cabin, after you have filled them up.
    $100 on top of the poo mountain (roll a dungball up and high jump off the
    dungball at the top).
    $100 accessed by jumping into the top left hole in the wasps' hive and then
    jumping across to another hole.
    $400 gained by rescuing the Queen Bee's hive a second time.
    $100 On top of the barn; you can get this after killing Marvin.
    $100 Gained by using the sunflower after she is pollinated.
    $100 After being flipped by the monk.
    $100 in the passage that the context pad in the backet opens.
    $100 At the top of the tower (very hard to reach; use the ropes and tail spin
    around the top of the turret, without hitting a guard or falling off the side -
    then jump off to the outside, landing in the water.
    $10 in the safe
    $300 accessed after defeating the Dogfish and jumping off its back.
    $100 by the flush.
    $100 on top of the castle
    $100 on the dinosaur's back
    $100 in Berri's cage
    $100 (?) at the end of Mugged
    $100 in the box with Jugga (you must chase this).
    $ ALMOST A MILLION at the end before you meet the Panther King.
    When you die the first time, you will get a cinema where Conker meets the
    helium - voiced Grim Reaper, who tells you you can have all the lives you think
    you need. He also tells you to pick up squirrel tails as extra lives; they can
    be found in the following places:
    1) Hanging on the signpost.
    2) In the passages below the Poo Cabin.
    1) In the passage opened by becoming an anvil.
    2) NEW! Ultra - secret tail! Go  along the area at the back of the "cheese pen"
    and start jumping around. If you find the right place, a lightbulb will appear.
    Press B to turn Conker into an anvil and you will find a tail that gives you
    TEN lives!
    1) Behind the waterfall.
    1) Before you swim through the fans.
    1) On the dinosaur's back.
    2) Above the bridge guarded by the Weasels, but its hard to get. You can only
    get to it after finishing the chapter and getting to the section above and
    going over an archway; it gives you FIVE lives.
    N.B. If you cannot find theTails, then it is because you haven't died yet
    On the options screen, go to the fireplace and select cheats ("you cheating
    8@$+@&*!" says the fire imp). Type in a code.
    N.B. Codes are erased when the power is switched off.
    (I should also say that I got the cheat codes from BLegacy's FAQ - just saying
    this so I am not sued).
    EASY: Makes the main game easier
    VERYEASY: Makes the game very easy
    DRACULASTEABAGS: Gives you 50 lives (in Story mode)
    The following codes apply to the Chapters section (found down the corridor with
    the Kazooie umbrella):
    WELDERSBENCH: Opens all chapters
    PRINCE ALBERT: Opens Barnboys
    CLAMPIRATE: Opens Bat's Tower
    ANCHOVYBAY: Opens Sloprano
    MONKEYSCHIN: Opens Uga Buga
    SPANIELSEARS: Opens Spooky
    BOVRILBULLETHOLE: 50 lives (Chapter Mode)
    Add extra characters in Multiplayer (available in Race and Deathmatch):
    WELLYTOP: Conker
    EASTEREGGSAREUS: Conker again, but in Matrix gear (seen in Heist)
    RUSTYSHERRIFFSBADGE: The Grey Squirrel Sergeant and the Tediz' leader (both
    very tough, though seeing the big Teddy shooting his own men is kinda weird)
    EATBOX: Ugas on all deathmatches
    CHINDITVICTORY: Play as all four weasel mafia members (except the boss)
    BEEFCURTAINS: Play as a zombie or a villager from Spooky
    SPUNKJOCKEY - Doesn't add characters but adds a Matrix effect whenever you kill
    someone with the Chainsaw or Katana; the action will go into freeze frame, but
    you will get a 36o degree rotation of the scene (this doesn't happen ALL the
    time, though)
    Just for fun I have decided to list all the film parodies that appear in the
    game; if you spot any I missed, e - mail me!
    Chapter: Introduction
    In the first scene we see a close up of Conker's face, and then the scene pans
    back to show him with his friends (most of the characters from the game),
    similar to the opening shot of Stanley Kubrick's controversial masterpiece -
    and it has the same music.
    The professor's voice sounds like Dr. Strangelove's.
    When Birdy says "Me Love Manual Long Time" it is like a quote from the film.
    Chapter: Barn Boys (Marvin)
    When Marvin explodes it is kind of like Mr. Creosote in the Monty Python film.
    Chapter: Barnboys (Buff You/Haybot Wars)
    The hay monster/cyborg even talks like Arnold Schwarzenegger.
    Chapter: Windy (Pruned)
    When you first see the bull he says: "Red Red"; perhaps coincidentally this
    sounds very like (and has similar intonation to) the line "Red Rum" from The
    The nasty/camp cog...
    Chapter: Bat's Tower (Bullfish's Revenge)
    Quite obvious really...
    JURASSIC PARK? (Corn Off the Cob)
    When the Great Mighty Poo (a.k.a. "Chucky Poo") eats the first sweet corn, it
    is somewhat like that film...
     SportsDude1117 writes: "saw the movie parodies u posted, & the 1 where u put
    JURASSIC PARK for the CORN OFF THE COB, i would say that looked like towards
    the end of DEEP BLUE SEA when the 1 guy is being thrown around in the water by
    the shark"
    Chapter: Sloprano (Sweet Melody)
    When you flush the Great Mighty Poo, he cries out; 'I'M FLUSHING! FLUSHING!"
    etc., similar to the Wicked Witch of the West's; "I'm Melting! MELTING!"
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Sacrifice)
    The Ugas being chased by the rock...
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Sacrifice)
    The whole dino idol reminds me of part of the movie.
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Rock Solid)
    The password to enter the club
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Bomb Run)
    ilfk@gmx.net writes: "The cut scene conkers is hired by the "mafia leader". the
    "don" kills one weasel with a baseball bats. this is from the movie "the
    untouchables" (or german "die unbestechlichen"). robert deniro as al capone
    kills one of his guys sitting round a table after talking about loyality with a
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Mugged/Raptor Food)
    In both chapters, Conker is mooned by Ugas, which is what the Scots do to taunt
    the English in Braveheart.
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Raptor Food)
    When Fangy first appears, Conker gets out a big watch and says: "Is that the
    time? I must be going"
    Chapter: Uga Buga (Raptor Food/Buga the Knut)
    Well, this is just a guess actually...
    Chapter: Spooky (Mr. Reaper)
    A bit of a no - brainer really; the zombies coming out of the ground - need I
    say more?
    Chapter: Spooky (Count Batula)
    Obvious again; Batula even has the same Marge Simpson - esque hairstyle (also
    parodied in The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror IV), and their conversation at the
    dinner table is similar.
    THE HAUNTING (Count Batula's Castle)
    The picture on the stairs is rather like the picture in the film...
    Chapter: It's War! (The Assault)
    Someone told me this, but I forget who - but the run up the beach is similar to
    the movie.
    Chapter: It's War! (Sole Survivor)
    Conker's line: "Tediz - I hate those guys!"
    Chapter: It's War! (The Assault)
    The spider mine getting its leg trapped in the door.
    Chapter: It's War! (Casualty Ward)
    The conversation between the two tediz surgeons, and when they say: "Quick,
    into character!"
    Chapter: It's War! (The Experiment)
    The "girl" turns her head 360 degrees and quotes from the film: "See what your
    f&(@ing daughter did?" and "I haven't been a little girl for quite some time!"
    Chapter: It's War! (The Experiment)
    When the big Teddy drops you it is similar to something from the film.
    Chapter: It's War! (Peace at Last)
    As you sail away the Sergeant quotes from the film.
    Chapter: Heist (Enter the Vertex)
    This whole section is based on the Matrix
    Chapter: Heist(The Vault)
    The Panther King with the stars behind him
    Chapter: Heist (The Vault)
    Berri's death
    Chapter: Heist (The Vault)
    An alien jumps out of the Panther King's body; Conker says: "Get away from her
    you *****!" and you must throw the alien out of the airlock.
    Chapter: Heist (The Vault)
    The talking computer (?) is kinda like HAL.
    END OF FAQ. See the top for the address to write to with any problems.

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