Review by Matzen12

Reviewed: 06/23/09

Super Mario? Nah, just plain Mario.

Matzen12 here, entering his very first review. This one's on the (in several people's opinion) classic Nintendo epic Super Mario 64. A lot of people out in the world loved this game and found it flawless. I didn't. I found it far from flawless, actually. Very far indeed...

Princess Toadstool has baked a cake for Mario and she wishes for him to come to the castle. A cake? A cake?! How lame is that? OK, moving on from the cake issue, Mario enters an empty castle to find out that (surprise surprise) Bowser has kidnapped Peach and you must get her back, by picking up stars and unlocking different parts of the castle. Not much of a story there, folks...
Score: 2/10

This is the real fun-killer. The controls are worthless. It takes forever to pick up a decent running speed and Mario's turning radius isn't even funny. It's also nigh impossible to hit the quicker enemies (despite Mario's new fancy punch-punch-kick combo, courtesy of the new B button), and I'm not even going to get in on the swimming (despite a neat trick that helps you regain all your life).

The main objective of this game is picking up stars by solving puzzles. You need a whole lot of stars to get to the final confrontation. This definitely becomes a chore in later levels. So yes, gameplay could have used more work.
Score: 1/10

This is the good thing about this game. For a 1996 game, these graphics were pretty darn amazing, and the (minor) voiceovers also helped. Sounds and music fit really nicely, actually. The soundtrack fits level atmospheres, and the sound effects seem well-thought of and have a pretty high quality for their time.
Score: 7/10

If you're like me, this is a big no-no. Yay, I kicked Bowser's behind. Now I can go and... grab all those stars again... yeah, right. You play through it once to prove you can, and then you forget you ever bought (or, as in my case, borrowed) this game to begin with.
Score: 1/10

This game was Nintendo's flagship into the 3D era, yes. Unfortunately, there were some holes in the hull. I found this game mainly to be a chore, and I fail to see what's so remarkable about it. Make no mistake, I've played worse. A lot worse. But this doesn't quite fall into my "good game" box, so it gets a four.

Rating:   2.0 - Poor

Product Release: Super Mario 64 (EU, 03/01/97)

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