Review by Psycho Penguin

Reviewed: 06/07/00 | Updated: 07/16/01

No wonder the Nintendo 64 was beat by PSX...


Ouch. Yes, I am giving Mario 64 (which was once hailed as ''the greatest video game ever'' a score of 1. First I gave Zelda a 7, now Mario a 1. Before you start flaming me calling me a ''Nintendo hater'', read my review and discover why I hate this game. I feel the game delivers a lacking gameplay experience and a bad camera adds greatly to the overall stupidity. The camera is what really does this game in, because it really takes away from whatever good qualities the game has. I know I am going to get lots of flames for this review, and I don't care, because this is my true feeling of the game, I just plain old hated it and I am going to tell you all why I hated ''the game of the millenium''

Graphics (8.3/10)

The graphics in this game are pretty good. The 3D backgrounds in the game are pretty good, and Mario himself looks pretty good. My biggest complaint is the camera system. Let me explain the graphics in even more detail.

Character and enemy designsin the game are decent. I especially like the fact that the enemies look a lot like the classic mario enemies from the previous games in the Mario series. For instance, the classic ''ball and chain'' enemy from the original Super Mario Bros. 3 game is featured in this game, and has a very nice 3D look to it. The character designs are great as well, I like the fact that all of the characters still look the same as they did in the previous games in the series. Overall, I like the character and enemy designs in this game.

The backgroundsin the game also have a nice look to them, as each of the various places in the game have a nice and unique look to them. For instance, while in the castle you can make out the individual torches and stuff, which means the lighting effects in the game are really good. Also, there are stages like the ice world where there is snow and ice everywhere. It really feels like you are in the arctic regions. There are also stages like forests and inside a volcano. It's really well done. Overall, the backgrounds in the game are pretty good!

The biggest problemis the damn camera system. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Never in my life have I seen such a horrible camera system. Apparently Lakitu is taping you and you have to control the camera yourself. No problem, right? But then you realize the fact that it likes to move on its own sometimes. So if you're running away from an enemy it will suddendly shift to the enemy and you have no clue where you are. The camera system overall is just plain terrible.

Overall, the graphics in Mario 64 may not be perfect, but you got to realize that this was the first Nintendo 64 game, and for the first game the graphics are pretty damn good!

Music/Sound Effects (4.3/10)

The music and sound effects in most Nintendo 64 games are not that good, mainly due to the fact that the Nintendo 64 console itself is kind of limited when it comes to the sound qualities of the games. Therefore, I was not expecting great music and sound effects from Mario 64. And this is good, because the game did not deliver at all!

Music: The music in the game is just plain average. I would have liked to hear more classic mario music than what was featured, but there was still some classic music there so I am not complaining too much. The music in the game, however, just wasn't very good. Maybe it was okay, but the problem is, it just didn't have the same feeling that the music in the other games did, and that's its biggest problem in my opinion. Overall, the music in the game is pretty good, but it's not great.

Sound effect wise, the sound effects in the game are pretty good, but I still think Nintendo could have done a better job with the sound effects in the game. The biggest problem with the sound effects i the game, in my opinion, is the fact that they just don't sound right. I mean, they each sound just a tad bit too kiddy. Oh well, maybe it's just me. Overall, the sound effects in the game are good but sound kind of kiddy for my tastes.

Overall, the music and sound effects in the game are okay, but they are certainly not perfect.

Control (5.3/10)

I dislike the analog stick a lot, but the game does control okay. Again, I disliked changing the camera angles with the Yellow C Buttons. I think that if the game would have used the directional pad, the control would have been even better than just ''decent''. The analog stick is okay, but I am just not that big of a fan of it at all. Overall, the control in the game is decent but would have been better had the directional pad been incorporated and the camera system been controlled differently.

Gameplay (1.3/10)

This is where the game falls apart, in my opinion. A game can have great graphics, music, sound effects, all that good stuff, but if the game isn't fun to play, then it isn't a good game. And Mario 64 is the perfect example of this. I know I am going to get flamed for this, but I hated this game. Most of the game was boring to play. I only had one fun time throughout the entire game, which I will explain before.

Rememeber when the Mario game were easy to understand? I still don't understand the fun in collecting 120 stars. Big deal. Most of the stars are easy to find anyways, and there's no real reason to collect them, since you only need 80 to beat the game, and you can get Yoshi without collecting all the stars. The game has a little bit of fun in it, such as racing this huge penguin (fun!) but the overall game is prety bad. Add the failure of the camera system and the game failing to deliver the fun factor together and you get a pretty overrated game.

The only fun part of the game, in my opinionis the Penguin race. I had a very fun time in this ''mini game'', which involves racing a giant penguin (no joke, believe it or not) through an icy paved road and tunnel and stuff. It's really fun. if only the rest of the game were as fun...

Overall, Mario 64 just isn't that fun to play. It has one good point, and the rest of it is just pure garbage.

Other Important Scores

Replay Value: Medium

Yeah, the game does have decent replay value, but only because of the enormous amount of secrets and the fact that you can collect 120 stars. Other than that, there is little to no replay value in the game at all. Overall, the replay value in the game is average, and would have been much lower had it not been for the 120 stars goal.

Challenge: Medium

Mario 64 is a decent challenge, sure. The biggest challenge I had with the game, however, is actually wanting to beat the game. The bosses were easy, and most of the goals were met with little problems. Overall, the challenge in the game is just average.

-The penguin race! Yay, it is a lot of fun!
-Music is decent for a Nintendo 64 game
-It isn't quite as kiddy as I would have expected

-Most of the game just plain old sucks
-Collecting stars can get to be a chore
-The %$#@#$ camera system!

Overall (1.2/10)

I'd rather jump off the Grand Canyon then play this game.. seriosuly, I don't understand the point of this ''game'' The Mario series has always been excellent, but the ''Mario Land 3, Yoshis Island'' and now this all stink. Thanks to my main man Sunshine for giving this game the score it deserves, all you people who gave this game 10 and 11, I respect your opinions but I don't agree with them at all!

Rating:   0.5 - Unplayable

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