Review by megamanzerox45

"After 1000 years, Batman is still slow as ever."

Batman has had his share of good and bad video game adaptions, examples being Batman Forever (bad), Batman: Arkham City (good), and Gotham Racer (????). This game is different, however for two reasons: it is based on (and sorta follows the plot of) the movie "Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker", one of the most underrated movies in the DCAU. I had never seen "Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker" before due to the commercial scaring the living snot out of me when I was a kid. However, I watched the film, and found it to be delightful, so I initially had (very small) hopes for this game. Once I started playing, however, I remembered the other thing: it sucks hard.

The opening is decent enough, and it starts out in a semi-interesting locale. Get used to it, because you'll be seeing it throughout most of the game. Kemco lamely tried to disguise it as Arkham, Wayne Manor, and even a warehouse, but it's obvious that they reused the background several times. After a very brief and weak cutscene, we cut to the game, where the problems begin.

First, the new Batman has only two moves in his repertoire: punching and kicking. He has some other weapons, but they suck, so you will just be restricted to using normal attacks on the enemies in room after room after room after room after... EVERY ROOM is this way. It's clear that the developers thought that this game was just like Streets of Rage, except for the fact that Streets of Rage isn't in 2.5D and is way more fun and challenging. Also, there are no boring "find the key missions" in Streets of Rage, and it has better special attacks, and... I could go on, but you get the idea.

Speaking of challenge, there isn't any; not even from the bosses. Either Joker and his goons aren't all that interested in destroying Gotham, or the designers couldn't even design challenge in our elections, let alone this game (I suspect the latter). All the while, generic "Ooh, it's the FUTURE!!!!!" music plays in the background. By FUTURE, of course, I mean stuff like "beep beep BEEEEEEEP boop beep beep" repeated to infinity and beyond. I could list more failures, but this would become a series.

In finality, the Batman Beyond movie was a deep, thrilling adventure that really put some depth into Batman Beyond. This game is merely soulless silicon in Streets of Rage clothing. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to watch Return of the Joker. I'm definitely going to have much more fun with it than I will with this game.

Reviewer's Rating:   0.5 - Unplayable

Originally Posted: 04/05/12

Game Release: Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker (US, 12/13/00)

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