Review by warlockd
"Its an ok run, its just not an exciting game."
I remember the old days of playing the original Duke Nukem 3D back when I was a kid. We would hall our computers over to a friends house every week to play that thing networked till we passed out in the morning. There was just nothing like it at the time. All those different weapons and monsters to kill! All the map packs you could download and burn though. Hell we even made our own maps and played those till they worn thin. Remember Doom1 and 2 was its only competitor and you played Duke in FULL 3D. That is you could walk on a second floor! Not even all the nifty weapons that were beyond the ability Doom could provide.
But this is nostalgia talking. This is back when I was a 16 year old brave in the face of computers. For all intents and purposes Duke Nukem Forever IS the clear, unequivocal sequel to the original Duke Nukem 3D. A sequel that never grew or evolved over these 15 years and just as dull as the original.
While the Duke never changed, we the gamers have. We expect a little excitement out of the games we play. If you play Duke Nukem 3D right now, you just see how dull it is. I loaded up my old copy on dos box and beat a good 4 levels fairly quick. Your just killing wave after wave of pigs while hunting for new weapons. Oddly enough, however, you don't do this in Forever. The pacing in this game is like a car with a bad clutch. It keeps lurching forward then idling for a while. Even driving the monster truck over pigs felt like it was all filler. You start just going though the motions, and the game controls are so simple it just becomes automatic. Evey monster encounter is predictable and every puzzle is just simple enough to figure out in a half a second. Hell, I had more problems finding the proper exit at each segment than anything else.
Now with saying its a dull game is a killer, there ARE good sides. People complain about only having access to two weapons at a time. That's what makes games fun! Just picture what it be like if you had every gun in a game, (aka Doom/Quake/Unreal). At the very least it makes a player choose what gun he likes the most or thinks is needed in the next area. The shrink ray sequences were awesome as well! Evey time those parts happen I sat up in my chair and paid a little more attention. It might be a wash of bad jokes, there are quite a few gems in there that made me laugh.
In the end, I have to say the game is just ok. Don't buy it at full $49, it will drop to $29 within a month or three. Unless, your like me, who saw the original 2001 Forever trailer live and watched the news about it till this day. Then you just need some kind of closure at that point.
PS - To sum up the sex content: Boobs and toilet humor. It gives you a chuckle and makes you groan, but the flaws in this game out pace any of the shock content.
Reviewer's Rating: 3.0 - Fair
Originally Posted: 06/17/11
Game Release: Duke Nukem Forever (US, 06/13/11)
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