Review by TheRMisterDerp
"It's like borderlands one, but if they got it wrong."
Borderlands 2 is an all right game, but it misses a lot of stuff the old borderlands had that made it good.
Lets start with the basics.
GAMEPLAY: 5/10 Borderlands 2 gameplay is pretty basic, nothing new, except there's a lot more guns and missions. The missions are, for the most part, all right, some of them can be hilarious (Example: the mission with Hammerlock about Bullymongs), and some can just be tragically boring or unneeded (Example, a certain mordecai mission made up of talking to people in sanctuary about..spoiler-ish things, any Scooter mission, pretty much all of Brick's missions, the list goes on.). The guns are new, and can be exciting, but for the most part, they aren't. Example, Hyperion weapons are terribly accurate, but get more accurate as you shoot. For maybe an SMG with a bottomless magazine, that's good, but for, say, a sniper rifle, it defeats the purpose of a sniper rifle, which is usually described as "Accurate, and if you're good, a one hit kill". Or the Tediore gunarang, which can hurt you unless you can hit an enemy with it.
GRAPHICS: 8/10 The graphics are amazing, but sometimes, if the game lags, which it usually does, it can look choppy and messy.
LANDSCAPING: 7/10 It all looks nice, but the one problem I have is it seems like the game doesn't know what it wants to look like. An ice land? A forest? A lava land? A desert? "Eh, just throw a little bit of everything in" is what I imagine Gearbox employees saying when designing the landscapes.
DIFFICULTY: 7/10 Normal mode, 2/10 Hard mode. Normal mode is fine, except enemies your level (But oddly enough, not enemies a level below you) doing high amounts of damage to you with crappy guns, and easily being able to swarm you. Which means a lot of tedious, time wasting rescanning and a drop in your hard earned money. In hard mode, no. Once you're at the max level, enemies will start going above the level limit. And this means they can easily kill you, even if its just a level 50 bandit with a gun. Not good game design, Gearbox.
GUN TYPES: 8/10 Now, this is where the game both excels and plummets in greatness. Lets go over every kind of gun manufacturer. Tediore has guns that are cheap, standard, not too good or bad. But the catch is they reload quickly. Why? Because you just chuck em' at an enemy. Even rocket launchers. The only problem is any ammo (excluding rockets) left in the gun will go WITH the gun, so SMGs and machine pistols might not be the best choice. Dahl is...eh..it's kind of a double edged sword in some cases. With assault rifles, you're gonna be aiming down the sights all the time, which makes the burst fire great. With things like sniper rifles, your aim will be thrown off easily when aiming and shooting. Otherwise, they're all right. Hyperion is..no. Don't use Hyperion guns unless its an SMG or machine pistol. To maybe a shotgun. Torgue is all right, for the most part. The only guns from them I'd use are their rocket launchers and pistols. Maybe assault rifles. Bandit guns are..well..good luck finding a good bandit gun with ok accuracy. Jakobs guns are where it's at. Their revolvers, assault rifles, sniper rifles, everything they have is great. Maliwan guns are pretty amazing if you can find a good fire or corrosive sniper/SMG. Vladof guns are purely amazing with all guns. Find a good assault rifle, pistol, sniper rifle, or anything they make. But if you really want destruction, find a good E-tech rocket launcher with corrosion. The game will be won at that point.
DLC: 8/10 for DLC1, which is the pirate DLC. It's fun, the missions are great, the pirate hunt treasure is..they're all double edged swords, but don't use the crappy MIRV grenade mod. Other than that, they're great. The secret bosses are terrible though and the Seraph weapons are a letdown. First, you have Hyperius, an insane Hyperion construction worker that can summon robot allies, and he can easily kill you no matter what. And he only drops a few Seraph tokens, which means you'll have to fight him time after time, spending bars and bars of eridium trying to kill him, and the other boss is..Well, he's an alright boss, but I don't know much about it. 7/10 for Torgue's campaign of carnage. It's fun, it's bloody, it's hilarious. The weapons are just pure amazing, the bosses are pretty fun, the missions are alright. But the best of it all is Torgue himself. He talks in yelling, he curses a lot, but its bleeped out due to a device strapped to him, and he is just plain silly. 1/10 for DLC 3, Hammerlock's big game hunt. It feels like I'm playing a boring, enraging game that took my money, gave me monkey crap, and called it quality. Well, that's what the game is, to be honest, but this DLC really shows it. You have the witch doctors who are literally invincible, unless you can glitch them into standing. Why? Because they have an attack that steals your health. And gives it to the doctor, at a rapid rate, that makes it impossible to kill them. Try to outrun it and you'll see that it has an infinite range. I'm not even gonna play this DLC all the way through because of these enemies. What were you thinking, gearbox employees? Invincible enemies? Screw this game, if you're gonna take our money and give us fake difficulty.
My final score for this game is 3/10. It has guns. It has fake difficulty. It has tedious missions. That's about it. Don't buy this game, please. If you want to play this game, play the first one. This game is like the first, but with a new, less shiny coat of paint. Imagine getting your dream car, but then giving it a coat of the dullest color you hate the most.
Reviewer's Rating: 1.5 - Bad
Originally Posted: 01/28/13
Game Release: Borderlands 2 (US, 09/18/12)
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