Review by Fein

Reviewed: 06/28/04 | Updated: 11/27/04

The only weakest link is me for playing this crap

God cursed all evil and Anne Robinson's celebrity status

It's been quite a good few years since the Weakest Link became another famous and high ratings prime time TV show that even took off a storm in America and made Anne Robinson the perfect surrogate Mother for Simon Cowell. So now to conquer the world of video games, where the show's rival, Who Wants To Be A Millionaire has horribly failed - can the Weakest Link pick up the pieces? Certainly, the process and actual concept of The Weakest Link makes it far more interesting on a video game than WWTBAM. And Anne does have the edge of Chris Tarrant's "Find out the answer after the break" I'm afraid.

But despite Anne's voice acting and common insults, everything tumbles and wanes so easily that you really wonder if these type of games are best left to TV. While Anne has gone on to remove the puppet strings used to hold her head up and allow her to wink at the end of the show and applied masses of botox to her face - the game could have done with the same treatment. After you've gotten over the "Jesus I can even vote people off!" phase and the insults Anne will deliver if you've answered badly and the abuse fellow contestants receive, you'll quickly be bewildered by the strong feeling of boredom and abandon this game as quickly as porno magazines when your Mum walks into your room. And that's only because in this case, she'll end up sitting down beside you and insist on playing with you. Worst nightmare?. The game never once seems exciting, and doesn't ever catergorise as a fun game even for the first few minutes.

To be honest, this game would suit the parents, who will find the novelty a "genius of modern technology". So for all those people with parents nagging on about how computers are damaging and completely hurling their repetitive constant bloody moaning quips at you - give them this game to both shut them up and to laugh at them. Now, where do I start with this odeous piece of junk?

Who's been a stupid f**k then? Who's so bloody thick they need a pop up book to tell them how to go to the toilet then? It's time to vote off the weakest link!

Yes, we all know the deal. You progress through seven rounds of answering questions, getting them correct moves the money up on a scale, if you can get seven questions right you can have a successful chain of £1000 to which if you bank, you'll get half of it to contribute at the end of the game. However, after each round you must vote the "weakest link" off - who is anyone who got the most questions wrong.

But as in the tv show, you're not watching or playing to see who wins, you're waiting for what whopper of an insult Anne will throw at the poor fools on the show. But there's one thing this game has that the TV show actually doesn't - when you see Anne's senile looks and cackily voice when she somtimes says "good-bye!", you cringe. Here you don't experience tha- oh sorry, yes you do. When she says "Let's plaaay the weakest link!" in the same tone of voice that crackles and squeaks - it's not very pleasant.

The selection of characters will make you chuckle though. You've got your pictorial of the public in which you basically choose people with different jobs and different tastes and interests. The fact that they specialise in a subject will mean absolutely nothing to you if you don't actually know the question but for the A.I of contestants, it helps.

You can vote off whoever you want, but let it be known that you are an easy target to the rest of the team. For instance, you can have one question wrong and you'll automatically be voted by the weakest link and some others if you're not careful. And don't think that tactical voting doesn't exist, because as in some of the shows, the three contestants left will vote in a tactic to get rid of the strongest player to better their chances of winning. That happens here.

And to further emphasise of the repitition of this game, there is the option of a simple exhibition and a championship mode in which the questions will also upgrade in difficulty in which you go through a series of rounds depending if you are victorious or not. Aside from this there is no real fun or parody based mini games in which you can participate in, it's all as serious as Anne Robinson's wardrobe.

Multiplayer is very fun though. Mainly because you'll actually get some competition and be able to derive some cattiness within the family or friends. It's the only real feat in which The Weakest Link doesn't bore you. But because of the downhill production rate of everythinge else, no pun intended but it won't stimulate you as any other TV show converted into game will.

Sadly, there is no real close up to Anne's face to capture that bit of spinach sailing in between her front teeth.

While The Weakest Link saves itself from having to use extensive graphics in some departments because they use the film credits of the TV show, what is left is disperged in misery. Sure, you can get the film roll of Anne telling you to vote off the "dog without a paddle" and her addressing you and mocking your job but the actual graphics only seem to come out in the actual studio. It's 3D polygons very messily done and ugly to look at - even more so if your eyes are actually on Anne.

I mean, the developers must have been really thicker than the actual contestants to think that with the dim lighting of the studio, we just wouldn't be able to notice that each contestant is wearing baggy blue trousers. Or the fact that they are lumpy and look as in they're relapsing. The studio just looks like a dark room with a singluar blue light shining down. Everything seems very poorly done graphically making this appear even more as a simple cash machine.

If Anne Robinson was having a facial, do you think she could play the Wicked Witch in the remake of the Wizard Of Oz? She has the voice that could crack glass and posesses the whiskers of Gandalf The Grey.

For the highlight of this game, Anne Robinson has donated her vocal or plain insult talents into the Weakest Link, at least giving the game one tick of an actual credit. As does the contestants, they all provide voices and replies to Anne's jibes or questions. And they make that final comment contestants make before being voted off.

The doomsday music from the show is also converted into the game, that does chill you in the sense it presents a mood of hurry hurry, bloody answer so I can bank! and it gives the sound department the only top notch the game achieves.

But the voices of the contestants are so fake and poorly acted and stereotypical that you'll just ignore them and cut them off. Anne's insults are unfortunately lame and uninnhibited than she would be on her usual daytime show which is another disappointment. Boo to that then.

So, The Weakest Link proves to be nothing more than...

Another part of the new franchise of Anne Robinson. The gameshow is weak and dull but it's the fact that Anne Robinson found her niche in being nasty towards people that have suprised people and made the show a hit, however, the same won't be repeated for the game as it's boring and repetitive and unhealthy towards enthiusiastic gamers. You want interactive entertainment, well you won't get it. As with the tv show, you could answer all the questions and still win no money. There is no innovation or anything fresh looking - and yes, I am referring to Anne's skin as well.

Leave the game where it belongs, at the top of a skip waiting to be crushed. You'll be doing the humanity of video games a favour.

Rating:   1.0 - Terrible

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