Review by chattyb
"Less fun than changing nappies"
From the day that I first lay my ten year old hands on a Sony Playstation, I have enjoyed every Crash game- bar one. Crash bandicoot, the wee bandicoot that we have learned to love so much, finally stars in a crap game! Crash Bash really lets the team down, as you will soon read.
Graphics: Playstation games have never been great with visual wonders (apart from Tekken 3), and this displays that in true colours. The backgrounds are bland most of the time, although the level 'Beach Ball' is quite nice. The visuals are kiddish, like any party game, with Eurocom opting for a bright, chirpy fruit bowl of colour. From a distance, all your favourite Crash characters look as they should, and Tiny Tiger actually looks like Tiny Tiger (unlike Crash warped), but once the stars get their close up, it really isn't flash. Eurocom should have realised by now, after a few thousand years, that animals have fingers. Not bricks, or whatever they look like to you. FINGERS! Crash games have never been ultra-realistic in the graphics department, but many titles at the same time can beat it by a fair bit. Okay, a bit more than a fair bit. Lots of games easily surpass this standard. Get the picture? The polar bears look cute though.
Overall score: 4/10 (Poorly designed characters)
Sound: I must admit, I do not pay much attention to sound in a game, but this game's sound really stood out like a sore thumb. The music is fairly nice, although most of it is just a rip-off from previous crash bandicoot games. The theme is the same as that of Crash bandicoot: Warped, but with a pleasant kick to it. The music is really repetitive though, with there only being about 8 songs in the game, and most of them are just edited versions of old songs. The sound effects are pretty nice though, especially in the Ballistix levels of the game. However, what is really off putting in the sound effects department is the polar bears in the Polar push levels. They sound nothing like the real thing. If people want dying cats in their games, then this is a good game for them. It sure sounds like they are dying. Playstations are capable of better than this.
Overall: 6/10 (Music is way too repetitive)
Gameplay: Party games are supposed to be a multi-player angel, right? WRONG! When I was having some mates round, we played my little gray box, long and hard. But we quickly got tired of this game.
The levels are full of glitches, and not the good type. There are six or so types of games, and there are four of each type. There are only two good ones. Polar push and Crash Bash. I will explain about them later. There are very slight differences in each one, like maybe a new power or weapon. The game is also not boosted by the fact that this is VERY hard. Too hard. After a year of this game, I still have not managed to complete. The one word that describes the gameplay is... average. Just darn everyday average. Kiddies, go and play with your barbies. Massage Grandmas toes. Go cut the grass. Or ever clean up your dog's toilet. It is probably much more fun than playing this, unless you are out of touch with the real world.
Overall: 5/10 (Very little variety, very hard)
Story and Characters: Okay, the story is much like very other crash game. You are a little guy called crash bandicoot, or one of his other cute little friends and you must save the world. Simple. No romance, no violence, no sense of modern realism. On the characters side, the game is let down by one thing- or monkey, as it happens top be. Did they really need to introduce Rilla Roo? A monkey in circus pantys. It was funny in Doctor Dolittle, but not here. There is a huge selection of other crazy little friends that crash has. Penta penguin would have been nice as a playable character. Look a Rilla now. ''Where is he?'', you curious readers ask? Sleeping with the fishes. He hasn't been in Crash Nitro Kart (PS2) or any others. But otherwise, you have just the usual. Ripper roo has always been my favourite (he is a bit like me), so he should have had a big part.
Overall: 6/10 (Why bring in Rilla Roo?)
Game modes: This section is not really reviewing, but more of an insight into what happens in some levels. Crash Bash is a game with good ol' crates. But instead of breaking them you chuck or lick them at others. This is the best of all the modes. Polar push is where you ride cute polar bears that sound like nearly-dead cats and try to ram other players who are on a polar bear off the edge of an unrealistically flat square iceberg. There is still fun to be had here. Next up is Pogo Pandemonium, where you are on a pogo stick and you bounce on coloured squares to gain points. Sound mundane? Well, it is. Tank wars is probably the worst of all the types of play. You are in a slow, dodgy tank and you need to blow up everyone else. I'll tell you what, this is a challenge. If you are Kong or Tiny, you will find you are virtually unmoveable in a tank.
Overall: 7/10 (Fun to be had, but some are very repetitive)
Lastability: This game will last you for years. Not because it is huge, but because it is hard. Too hard. Once you complete Crash Bash (I solute you, soldier), you will have no urge to replay it and may as well sell it for five bucks and buy another crap game for a weekend's enjoyment.
Overall: 4/10 (Gets boring quickly)
Overall: This game is a big disappointment in the Crash series. If you find this for a bargain price, then go for it. Once you are bored of this, you could use it as a beer mat or a frisbee for when you are down at the park.
Graphics: 4/10 (The characters are really not nice)
Sound: 6/10 (Repetitive music)
Gameplay: 4/10 (Way too hard)
Story/Characters: (Rilla Roo really isn't cool)
Game modes: 7/10 (A bit repetitive)
Lastability: 4/10 (Gets boring)
I hope this review has influenced your future decisions on buying games. Happy gaming!
Reviewer's Rating: 2.5 - Playable
Originally Posted: 04/11/04
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