Review by Braben
"They haven`t understood anything..."
If you go and read all the competent Battletoads reviews you will always find two major problems: the absurd difficulty and the lack of traditional beat em-up stages. People have been complaining about that since the first game, but it seems Rare and Tradewest didn`t give a damn about it.
Even with that, the previous games in this evil series had redeeming qualities, the very first Battletoads game because it was that, the first one, and with its warps it was possible to play for a good amount of time; then Battletoads & Double Dragon because it had a decent number of beat em-up stages and most importantly, because it was the easiest (easy for a Battletoads game this is); but this one, this one lacks any redeeming quality, it is the hardest, it has only two or three beat em-up stages, and what is worst, it is the best looking in the series.
Exactly what you would expect in a 16 bit Battletoads game, what I mean is that they are as good for a Snes Battletoads game as they were in the Nes some time ago (and in case you don`t know, that is a good thing). The characters are a lot bigger however, like the scenarios, and the toads and enemie`s hilarious and over the top animations are still as over the top and hilarious as always, or maybe even more. Very good visuals, it is a pity that you are only going to see the three first stages (and only if you are skilled enough).
Needless to say, it kicks MAJOR butt. Again, the soundtrack features a lot hard rock themes that not only are catchy, they have a tremendous quality and are badass as hell, just go and bring any rock fan, he (or she) will feel like in heaven. The music deserves a 20 over 10.
We still have the typical Battletoads development, this is, instead of kicking pig butts in a beat em-up way, most stages have special vehicles or strange gadgets in the same vein waiting to torture us with its ludicrous difficulty. And that is basically all, for those who have already played the previous Battletoads games there is nothing else to say, and even the less considering that there a lot of stages that are just a remake of the original, like when we have to jump over those coloured snakes for example, but there are some more.
Ultimately, yes, we have a stage where we have to ride those super sonic bikes, and yes, it is even harder than before, but guess what?!, it is not the toughest stage in the game, yeah you have read well, but I am not going to waste time on them, it wouldn`t be healthy.
Oh yeah the plot, well, it is about the Dark Queen messing around again, she plans or she has done something evil or stuff like that and you have to stop her and, you know, beat her, that pretty much sums up everything.
As a result:
I don`t know exactly what to say, this game is, like any other in the series, a bloody disappointment, but as we cannot even use warps (like in the first game and that was the only way to beat the third stage and so the only way to enjoy the game), once we reach the super sonic bike stage (which is also the third stage) there is no use to keep playing, and if you, somehow, manage to beat that stage (i.e. cheating), the others are as hard or even harder, much harder, not to mention unfair (at first you will have no idea about how to use some of the new gadgets for example).
So there you have, if your are a masochist, try this game, but you have been warned, and do not forget to keep all the windows open while playing if you loose your temper easily, unlike CDs, cartridges are solid enough to break them.
Reviewer's Rating: 1.5 - Bad
Originally Posted: 09/01/04
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