Review by NeoBomberKid

"The LA division of EA should be smitten. Repeatedly."

Why is it that I hate this game so much? Okay, I'll tell you. This game is bad because of nearly everything except the shooting part. I thought that with 'Assault' in this game that it would be made by the same team that did Allied Assault. I'm telling you right now to lower your expectations. Yep, that's good... Little lower, though. Little more. Oh, you think this is undeniably going to be bad? Then we're in agreement.

Let's start off with game-play, just like everyone else who reviewed this game. What the hell was the LA division thinking when they put this together? Against Axis soldiers using cover, your bullets seem to act just like Raiden's did against Fortune in Metal Gear Solid 2; they never hit things. I played Allied Assault online and offline until my PC broke down. That was some 3 years of practice, so I'm a crack shot. The problem with this game is that when your enemies take cover, it's almost impossible to hit them. You can use a sniper rifle against a moron who has his head sticking up out of cover (or any other body part for that matter) and I can almost guarantee that it won't hit him. Unless they're looking to see if someone's there or firing, you probably can't hit them, even if your crosshairs are on them.

Apparently, you're a one-man army because even if there's an army with you, every gun turns and shoots in your direction. This makes the use of cover crucial, but it also keeps you frustrated as you use the aiming feature to poke your head from behind a box or something to fire at the hordes of Nazis that you need to get rid of. Keeping your health up becomes extremely hard for anyone who doesn't feel like chucking their much needed grenades at everyone they see that happens to have the swastika slapped on their tricep.

The intelligence of enemies and allies isn't too great, either. Despite the fact that you might have a sniper rifle, the enemy pokes their head out every 10 seconds to see if you're still there. Your allies aren't exactly Einstein's family, either. They'll stand exposed in the middle of fields, run in front of enemies and tanks, and generally screw things up for you. They kick grenades that you try to throw into the doorway (which they'll stand in and get shot at, by the way) so that they hit none of your enemies. They actually stand in front of you while you're trying to snipe in levels like the ones of North Africa, so you have to aim through a semi-transparent skull to shoot things. The worst part is you can't kill them, either. Explosions from all the crap you need to blow up doesn't kill them. Your grenades don't. Your bullets don't. Only the enemy can.

Adrenaline doesn't help any of this, either. Adrenaline Mode is the stupid Max Payne/Matrix bullet-time effect that's crammed into nearly every action game to hide its mediocrity. Sadly, the game is built around this, meaning you'll have to use it at one point or another. Way to go, guys. This is really what companies shooting for realistic WWII shooters should put into their games. Adrenaline Mode is also the only opportunity that you get to run-and-gun in this game, since it not only does bullet-time, but also gives you invincibility and infinite ammo.

The only great part of this is that real German is used. Oh, and the music is great. It damn well better be; it's a Medal of Honor game. The sound effects are good, too.

Back to what's so damn bad. Starting off is a raid on Saint Nazaire, a port city of France. The beginning sucks you in immediately, creating an intense experience. After you complete the Saint Nazaire missions, you're immediately sucked out. For some stupid reason, the LA division thought it would be cool to death march one guy all across the European theatre. Somehow, your guy gets to go to North Africa to help the British, Russia to help who else but the Russians, and the British again in Battle of the Bulge and Saint Nazaire. You can never get attached to anyone because of all this shooting around that you do. I hate to tell EA, but no soldier managed to get around or through German and Italian lines to meet with the Russians until late in the war. The Russians fought on their own until that point, perhaps with a very rare exception.

With game-play that has been built up slightly and yet somehow become worse, crappy AI, and a horrible plot, it's hard to like this game. Which is why I have a suggestion for EA: shut down your LA division and fire everyone there. It's obvious they're too incompetent because any game I've played that was developed by that team made me want to find a Walther P38 and shoot myself in the throat. Also, another suggestion: for once, do something different. Political correctness for the masses be damned, I want to play as a German, Italian, or Japanese soldier. Why? Because it'll be more original than forcing another fictional Allied soldier down our throats. Call me a Nazi for suggesting it, but I'd like to see both sides of the story. Hell, you could probably get Pope Benedict's permission to use his account of the war as the plot.

This game probably isn't even worth a rental, but I got it for about US$40 at my local EB Games store. Now I want my damn money back.

Reviewer's Rating:   2.0 - Poor

Originally Posted: 12/08/05

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